With You
by Sky-Pirate-Tat
Summary: [Amedot] [Contains past Lapidot] Amethyst is a popular camgirl on the Flirty Girls site and Peridot is her newest, biggest fan. NSFW
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** This story is NSFW and contains past Lapidot.

Peridot uses they/them pronouns

*This fic is also posted on A03 if it's hard to read on .

X

There was a perfectly logical explanation for this: it had started out as a joke.

Peridot had known for months that their roommate, Lapis was a camgirl, and finally figured out the moniker she used, as well as the site. Peridot's first clue was finding a check stub poking out of an indiscriminate pile of papers on the kitchen table. The paper had stuck to the bottom of their coffee mug, a stain spreading through the paper.

"How archaic," Peridot had commented, finding irony that an online site physically mailed check stubs. The company's name was discreet. It was a good guess on Peridot's part, and also the fact that Lapis had no other source of income after getting fired at the ice cream shop next door.

With a quick Google search of the company name on the check stub, Peridot found the camming site within minutes. That was the easy part, the hard part was finding Lapis's handle. They had tried all the ocean or water themed names but found every camgirl but their roommate. Of course, that would be too obvious wouldn't it? So Peridot backtracked and considered that maybe Lapis used a name that they both knew embarrassed her to throw Peridot off the trail.

"Oh, Lazuli," Peridot chuckled, searching the name: 'Raven Darkcloth.' "Never left your goth phase, did you?"

Peridot recognized the first person in the search results as their friend, and after a bout of snickering, joined her chat room. It wasn't as interesting as Peridot had expected, or maybe whatever it was Lapis and her fans were into wasn't to their taste. It only got interesting when Peridot derailed the chat and got a rise out of Lapis, snippily cursing at Peridot before shortly kicking them out of the room.

Peridot considered hacking into the chat site to remove the ban on their IP address, then considered looking through the rest of the cam site and made an executive decision, typing "BBW" into the search bar.

The resulting women were beautiful, some curves, many plentiful and plump, unabashed of their rolls. However, the profile pictures were nearly all the same: close up shots of asses or breasts, not unappealing, but impersonal.

One profile picture stood out from the rest, a shot of a short and stout woman with a shock of platinum blonde hair hanging over half of her face. Peridot found themself hovering the mouse over the profile picture and a gif of the current cam show played. The same woman was lounging in a messy pile of covers, languidly eating pizza, the cheese runny and dripping down her breasts.

"Some people are into some weird stuff," Peridot said as they clicked on the gif, entering the camgirl's room.

The instant Peridot entered the room, they realized how different this was compared to Lapis's room. They could feel the other woman's eyes on them– or rather– her eyes following her computer screen, reading the messages in the chat.

"Heeeeey, new guy," she said, and waved, her mouth full, chunks of pizza falling into her lap.

 _[Hello]_ Peridot typed.

 _[Show us your puss!]_ One message interrupted theirs, followed by a whole string of similar demands.

"She's already naked," Peridot mumbled under their breath, rolling their eyes. Really, what else were they expecting to see? I should just leave, Peridot thought, yet they were still here, taking in the haphazard stockpiles that were in the camgirl's room: the box of tampons, the luchador bobblehead collection, scattered DVDs, and dirty clothes made sense, but the broken tennis racket and cat carrier with a rusted door were questionable.

Two new users joined the room.

The woman on screen finished her pizza, wiping the grease on her bare thigh, leaving a snail trail streak. "So, for any of you freaks that are new: I'm Amethyst."

Peridot wondered if that was really her name. A part of them really believed it. Amethyst seemed down to Earth, like the kind of girl next door who got you into fun trouble that you only half regretted. She seemed like the type of person who you wanted to buy a beer for. She seemed nice. Genuine. And she burped on camera and laughed it off, asking her viewers to rate it.

 _[10/10]_

 _[9/10]_

 _[Adequate.]_ Peridot supplied.

 _[Show us your puss!]_

"She's already naked, you clod," Peridot muttered. How did Amethyst and Lapis deal with these people?

Peridot quickly learned it was better to close out the chat window, knowing they were well past curiosity when they simply didn't choose to exit the site. Disgust at the commenters aside, they really liked Amethyst. While Amethyst talked about a movie she watched recently and complained about her roommate (who had sneaked into her room when she was out and managed to clean a corner of her room before she was caught) , Peridot leaned back in their chair and relaxed. There was something soothing about Amethyst's voice and the way she was just casually sprawled naked on the bed…

Peridot could easily picture the other woman as their girlfriend, sharing the finer details of her life and venting, curled up against her body. Of course, coming back to reality, that wouldn't ever happen. Whatever relationship Amethyst had with her viewers was strictly business, a fantasy. But it was still a fantasy Peridot found they liked to entertain.

And that's when they realized that they had been single for too long, resorting to a pseudo relationship with a cam girl whose show they'd only been watching for the past three hours.

"When's the last time I dated?" Peridot asked during breakfast the next day, which was technically lunch but the first meal of the day for them and Lapis.

"Since me," Lapis replied flatly, placing an uneaten pizza crust back into the box.

"Yes. I was afraid of that." Peridot frowned and took the abandoned pizza crust, picking up where Lapis left off.

"Dating is dumb," Lapis said.

"I don't know. It seems nice… to have someone to talk to, to share everything with. I miss that."

"I guess," said Lapis, shrugging, picking up a new slice of pizza.

It was conversations like this that made Peridot uneasy. Although the breakup had been hard on Peridot's part and initially awkward because they still lived together, it could have been messier. Peridot was grateful they were still friends but often wondered if it was their fault that the relationship had fallen apart. And Lapis hadn't dated since then either, but unlike for Peridot, it had been by choice.

The rest of the pizza and the awkward bits of crust were stowed back in the fridge and Lapis went out, leaving Peridot to their coding program and thoughts. The apartment was quiet, amplifying the conversation they had over sorta-breakfast, and within the hour Peridot had opened a tab to the dating site Stupid Cupid and was agonizing over making the perfect profile. Rather than working, they sorted through their small assortment of pictures for the perfect profile picture and then struggled to message the prospective love interests that the site suggested.

No one replied back to their messages over the next week, and although they had several "likes," no one had bothered to approach them.

"Dating is dumb," they agreed. They deleted their Stupid Cupid profile and went straight to the Flirty Girls Cam site.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** There is a mention of marijuana use in this chapter.

X

It was past two in the morning when Peridot searched for Amethyst's page (screen name: PrplPuma). Would Amethyst be awake? She seemed like the type to stay up until dawn, but was she like Peridot and also the type to be up all night, wasting time on the internet? If not, Peridot had formed a plan B to pass their time: a Camp Pining Hearts fanfic, a friend's recommendation that had been hanging out in their tabs for weeks.

Amethyst's cam was live, with only three other viewers including Peridot.

"Eh, it's a weeknight," Amethyst shrugged when someone asked.

 _[How are you?]_ Peridot typed.

"Good I guess. Feelin' that burrito though."

 _[We dared her to eat it,]_ one of the other viewers supplied.

 _[She dared us to dare her to eat it,]_ the one other replied.

 _[What was in it?]_ Peridot asked.

Amethyst tallied the ingredients off her fingers. "Pizza, chips, egg salad, macaroni…"

 _[Why?]_ Peridot balked, horrified by the concoction.

 _[Because she can.]_

Amethyst nodded. "Yep." She wasn't completely naked this time, wearing an oversized plain black T-shirt. She was pantsless, and by suggestion, wore no panties either. Her breasts were large, not perky, nipples pointed against the shirt fabric.

 _[So do you do this for every camshow?]_ Peridot said.

"Uh, if you mean lay around naked and do whatevs… yeah, pretty much. You new here?"

 _[I found your room last week. This is my second time.]_

"Oh yeah? How'd you find me?"

 _[We love you Amethyst!]_

 _[yeah! Ur awesome]_

"Aww. I love you guys too."

Peridot liked the people in the chat this time. They seemed nice. They didn't yell demands at Amethyst.

 _[I looked you up through the site's search.]_ Peridot replied matter of factly. The two other guests also contributed.

 _[Your tumblr.]_

 _[Cam roulette.]_

"Niiice." Amethyst leaned back, eyes lazy and droopy, not sleepy, something else-

 _[Is it 4:20 where ur at, Amy?]_

She nodded, "you caught me, copper."

 _[Going to have to arrest you.]_

She laughed, presenting her wrists to be cuffed, "oh no, officer! What can I do to change your mind?"

 _[I can think of a few things.]_ They seemed to purr via text.

Peridot watched, hands hovering over the keyboard, speechless, watching Amethyst touch herself according to the two other guests beck and call. Her hips undulated to her fingers, furiously stroking her clit. Peridot gasped in synchronicity with Amethyst. Her clit. It was- huge. Full, flush and pretty, framed by large petal like inner labia.

Peridot felt a spike of white hot heat between their legs, and gripped one of the office chair arms, not exactly resisting the urge to touch themself but ashamed they wanted to while watching Amethyst. Porn was one thing because it didn't feel real but Amethyst was real and human.

Peridot couldn't bring themself to look past that and stuff their hand down their pants.

When Amethyst finally sighed, stiffening and falling back, legs twitching, Peridot felt their clitoris throb and cunt twitch, like they were about to come.

 _[H O T!]_

 _[Sexy beautiful]_

Peridot pondered a message, if Amethyst were in front of them, a screen not between them, they would have given their best golf clap.

 _[You seem to know what you're doing.]_ They lamely said.

But Amethyst didn't reply. She fell asleep, snoring within minutes, forcing Peridot to turn the volume of their headphones down.

 _[night babe]_ Someone, not Peridot said.

The two others lingered, chatting amongst themselves, making a few attempts to get Peridot to talk. After awhile they left the room, leaving Peridot and the occasional visitor that blinked in and out of the room.

Amethyst's snoring was loud, but strangely soothing and Peridot found it impossible to read the Camp Pining Hearts fic, their eyelids growing heavy. It wasn't like them to pass out before six. Probably better that way.

 _[Good night, Amethyst.]_ They typed before they left the room, Amethyst twitched in her sleep, perhaps hearing the notification message.


	3. Chapter 3

Peridot woke up before noon with their hand between their legs, fingers and cunt thick with slick.

When they had dated, Lapis had teased them about it: "hey, did you know you masturbate in your sleep?"

"I do?"

"Furiously."

"That doesn't make you uncomfortable?"

"It's cute." Lapis had shrugged. "What were you dreaming about?"

Peridot never remembered their dreams but had a strong suspicion they dreamed about a certain camgirl and wished they did remember. Lapis said she was a lucid dreamer, that her dreams felt real and she could smell and taste things.

If Peridot could remember their dreams, then maybe they could vividly imagine how Amethyst tasted, or what it felt like to be smothered by her pussy, pressing all her weight on Peridot's face. Maybe some of that sexual tension could be resolved.

"Maybe I should reactivate my Stupid Cupid profile."

It remained just a thought, instead Peridot checked their emails; personal and work related then went downstairs to brew a cup of coffee. Lapis was there to greet them at the bottom of the steps, drinking out of her own clownfish mug.

"Hey."

"Is there more coffee?"

Lapis nodded, taking a sip. She took her coffee black. "Like my soul." She would not quite joke.

Peridot walked past her, the smell of stale warm coffee greeting them. The cabinet was sparse for clean mugs, most all their dishes stewing in the sink. Peridot managed to find one mug that was clean, a souvenir from a vacation to Roswell, New Mexico. The alien cartoon character on the mug was worn, barely legible. It was clearly Peridot's favorite mug.

When Peridot finished mixing in too much cream and sugar, Lapis called to them from the living room. She was watching a movie, still in her pajama pants and an oversized T-shirt that sagged at one shoulder blade, revealing a part of the broken chains that made up her tattoo sleeve. Although it was Wednesday, Lapis was treating it like a Saturday, cradling a bowl of cereal while he clownfish mug sat at the foot of the couch.

"Want to watch this movie with me?"

Peridot frowned. "I have work to do."

"You're working from home, right?" It wasn't so much a question, Peridot only ever slept in on a weekday on such occasions.

"I'll bring the laptop down."

"I'll pause it."

"That won't be necessary." They'd both watched this movie so many times they'd lost count. It was their go to on dull days or when a movie they opted to watch on Netflix ended up being a waste of time.

Lapis had paused the movie anyways, hitting play only after Peridot situated themself on the couch next to her, the laptop precariously perched on their thighs.

For the most part, Peridot listened to the movie as they worked, knowing it by heart, imagining the scenes in their head, eyes on the computer screen. Once or twice they did look up, unable to resist their favorite scenes or because Lapis was laughing. Before the movie ended, Peridot found they had finished their work for the afternoon and set the laptop aside to sidle closer to Lapis. Lapis shifted too, closer, comfortably, breath warming Peridot's shoulder.

Peridot wondered, feeling the heat of Lapis's arm around her's why they weren't an item. They had been once and it had been perfect up until a certain point- when Peridot wanted to take the relationship more seriously.

Lapis ended the relationship, for reasons she wouldn't explain and despite the awkwardness, they both continued to live together. That was two years ago. The emotional thrall and awkwardness was for the most part gone but there were moments like this, when they were close, or when Lapis kissed the corner of their mouth that Peridot wondered why it couldn't be more. Or maybe it was more already, unspoken. Peridot was at this point afraid to say anything, afraid to ruin whatever it was they had going on, or their friendship.

Did it mean anything that Lapis hadn't said anything when she had caught Peridot working on their Stupid Cupid profile a week ago? Peridot had jumped, worried she would, hoping she would react. Lapis had merely slid her eyes from the screen to the book she was reaching for across from Peridot and said nothing.

Nothing.

Lapis browsed through Netflix as soon as the credits rolled and Peridot got up to fill both mugs with more stale coffee. The coffee was cool after the two hour movie, but neither were so picky to not drink coffee reheated from the microwave. Not like Peridot's coworkers whose eyebrows raised in surprise whenever they did it at the office.

But whether stale, or cold, or reheated, Peridot hated to waste good coffee.

Maybe it was the coffee that made Peridot shift impatiently on the couch midway through the next movie, or Lapis's legs draped over her lap, or Lapis's scent. Alright, really it was all that and the warmth spreading from belly to cunt, making them wet.

Seriously. Peridot held their head. Stars, why? All they were doing was watching a movie and Amethyst had been far from her mind until the moment they realized how turned on they were. Lapis had been the closest and as Peridot took in the cold curve of her mouth and dark circles framing pretty blue eyes, Lapis caught her, holding gaze with them.

Peridot felt their heart catch in their throat for a second. Then Lapis slid her gaze away, back to the movie. Peridot felt no relief from this as their pulse suddenly returned, pounding between their legs, their clitoris throbbing. Peridot itched, not to touch theirself(although that was their first instinct) but for someone, anyone, Lapis to pull back the waistband of their boxer shorts and …

Peridot suddenly stood up and Lapis reached for the remote, prepared to pause.

"Are you okay?"

"No." Peridot replied honestly.

Lapis paused the movie. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." Again, honesty. Brutal honesty.

"All right." Lapis breathed, resigning without a fight. Lapis herself liked to be left alone when she had something on her mind, Peridot knew their roommate was granting them the same pardon. She didn't question it, she just understood.

How well she understood was the question, Peridot thought, shuffling in a hurry up the stairs. The friction their thighs made as they climbed up the stairs encouraged them to lock the door and pull the covers over their body.

They kicked off their boxers somewhere at the end of the bed (ensuring entrapment under the covers, lost until laundry day) and reaching down, found they were insatiably wet. But no matter how much pressure, or teasingly Peridot stroked, or how vividly they imagined someone's tongue parting their folds it wasn't enough. They came but it wasn't enough. In the end, it was all their own machinations that brought the orgasm.

Not whispered words, not bodies pressed together, sharing heat, power. Affection. A bond. There was only so much masturbation could replace.

Peridot had staved off their desires long enough and could feel themselves fraying, and quickly. What were they doing, waiting for Lapis to change her mind? Why did they continue to hope something would after two years? It was illogical and humiliating that they had waited as long as they had.

Peridot liked to think they still had their dignity. Sulking in bed half naked helped them realize they had been lying. Peridot rolled over, "I'm a pathetic, illogical, dope." They started, pressing their face to the pillow, sighing.

Another moment, taking everything in. Deep breath and- Peridot threw off the covers. They were not one to stay still. Overthinking while still was dangerous, a seductive route to personal injury. And Peridot hated feeling sorry for themself, for feeling small.

They would not give up that easy. Something had to change. Something. Not Lapis. Not their friendship with Lapis.

Peridot would have to make the changes they wanted. It was the only logical solution.


	4. Chapter 4

The Stupid Cupid profile was reactivated after a shower and change of clothes. Peridot wiped their profile clean and started from scratch, and then, rather than wait for others to contact them, they browsed through the list of matches and made the first move.

Most of Peridot's messages were unanswered, but the five others who did were not a total waste of time, Peridot made sure of that. Even if they were incompatible, Peridot was determined to take something from the conversations and the two dates they set up.

They learned from Serena how to break the ice over lattes and Janice taught them the importance of punctuality after waiting half an hour for her to arrive. Both women had been pretty, splendid company but not what Peridot was looking for. What were they looking for? Well, it was a feeling. On those dates, Peridot hadn't felt that draw, that same energy that had drawn them to Lapis and now (ashamed to admit it) to Amethyst.

Amethyst who was unattainable, a camgirl, not even an online friend. Amethyst who continued to tease them through the other side of a screen, and who Peridot listened to as they worked late at night, coding.

To Peridot, Amethyst was like a friend who helped them unwind after a long day that made them laugh. And Amethyst didn't even know who they were, just another scrawl of text among the other, many fans on her channel.

That's what Peridot told themself. Often they doubted this was true because Amethyst was sweet and always thanked her guests when they complimented or tipped her. But that was likely all business and perhaps even that laid back attitude was like a cashier's smile, a nicety that shouldn't be looked into too deeply.

Peridot tried not to assume.

When Amethyst announced she was doing private shows over skype, Peridot poorly resisted. They reasoned it would be a just reward; their boss had warned the whole team to expect an exorbitant workload this week. Peridot had been the only one excited about this challenge while their co-workers groaned and complained about missing out on time with the kids. Peridot was gleeful not to be held down by parental obligations. Based on the occasional misfortune to run into children at the store and overhearing their co-worker's gossip, children sounded like a waste of time and money. There wasn't even any guarantee that the kid would be grateful for what the parent had done for them.

Peridot pitied those co-workers and gloated about their own freedom.

Peridot was never invited to go out for lunch. They supposed the truth hurt.

There was no doubt the work assigned to them would get done but it was a nice excuse to indulge themselves. And in spite of Lapis's spotty job record, they never hurt for money. And Peridot had begun regularly tipping Amethyst during her shows.

The absurd part was that during this heavy work week, Peridot's Stupid Cupid profile blew up and several messages went unanswered.

Lapis was quieter than usual, somehow aware that Peridot was busy. Lapis wasn't much of a cook but made sure Peridot was eating, leaving sandwiches or Chinese take-out near their work area.

Late Saturday evening, Peridot made the final touch on the program and leaned back in their chair and nearly fell asleep. It was an email notification that roused them. Spam. Nothing important.

They yawned, stretching and somehow made it to bed although they had no recollection of the event. Then they slept until Sunday evening, this time woken by Lapis who knocked on the door and prodded them.

"I was making sure you didn't die." She explained, putting aside the stick.  
"What time is it?" Peridot groaned, reaching for their phone. Lapis set it in their hand. The phone's light was blinding and Peridot squinted, and growled like a bear pulled out of hibernation.

"I slept almost a whole day." Peridot muttered, incredulous and largely embarrassed. Lapis pushed a brown bag full of food beside them. It smelled greasy and sweet. Fried chicken and waffles from Lenny's Diner. The breakfast of champions.

The food was cold when Peridot emerged from their shower but they ate it anyways, bathed in the limelight of their computer screen. Time for that reward.

They didn't expect Amethyst to be awake for another few hours, planning to leave an email but when they reached her page the indicator that she was online was flashing from the top right corner, right next to her profile picture.

[Hey. Are you still doing private shows?] Peridot tentatively asked.

[Depends who's asking.] Amethyst surprised them with an instant reply.

Peridot paused, hands hovering over the keyboard, swallowing. And then, another reply:

[Just kidding. Yeah, I am. U interested?]

Peridot's anxiety didn't alleviate in the least. The beating in their chest skyrocketed.

[Naturally. How do we go about this?]

[Leave me a tip or donation dealie. U can pay whatever but if u go cheap on me well, u get what u pay for, buddo. ]

Peridot was unsure what would be the best amount to pay and after fruitless research guessed that one hundred fifty dollars was a reasonable sum.

They couldn't believe they were doing this.

In the bottom left of their screen was a flashing orange notification from Skype. A new friend request.

Amethyst.

Soon after the friend request was accepted, Amethyst called. Peridot fumbled to answer, careful to turn their own camera off.

"Sup!" Amethyst waved. She was topless, her nipples pert. Peridot wished they could reach into the screen and nip and suck-

"You there?"

[Yes.]

Amethyst laughed, "shy guy, huh? Soooo what do you want me to do?"

Peridot bit their lip. No one had ever asked them that. What did they want? Peridot wasn't even sure what that was. Companionship? Yes, definitely but that was ridiculous to pay a sex worker to not do sex things. Wasn't it?

[Just be yourself.] Peridot chose a safe request. [I like anything you do, Amethyst. You're gorgeous.]

They almost didn't add that bit, but had seen other guests compliment her looks. Even still, Peridot's heart raced and they felt giddy, openly admitting their attraction.

Amethyst smiled, and laid back, tilting the camera to follow her. Surrounding her was a crumbled bedspread and various wrestling action figures and empty cans of soda. A white cat jumped on the bed next to her face and she gently shoved it off. They both laughed at that.

Then Amethyst reached off camera and brandished a thick purple dildo. She blew back the bangs from her face before leaning down to suck the phallic object. For a moment, for the first time Peridot saw one of her eyes, usually covered by a sheet of platinum hair. She had a lazy eye and a squint.

Amethyst's mouth was wet, sucking the dildo with sloppy abandon. She moaned, mouth full. Peridot had watched her do this before. The difference was, it was for Peridot. Just for them. Not a crowd of people in a chat room.

Amethyst looked straight into the camera, bent over the phallus, full lips teasing the tip, as if to say: "baby, if you were here I'd suck you off like this."

Drawing back, Amethyst made a request of her own: "hey, you wanna get on cam?"

[Why?]

Amethyst shrugged, grinning lecherously. "I like seeing reactions. You don't gotta but I think it's more fun that way."

As she adjusted the camera she spread her legs and ran the dildo, slick with spit along her plump labia. Again, she looked straight into the camera. "C'mon. I wanna watch you get off for me."

Peridot hesitated, considering. They were fully clothed. Boxers soaked, clit throbbing against the front of their pants. They hadn't noticed that they'd crossed their legs and frotted in their chair, the entire time watching Amethyst.

Peridot bit their fingers and pulled their hair all at once, apprehensive but aroused by the thought of Amethyst looking her right in the eyes as she came.

That was the deal breaker for Peridot, who hurriedly turned on their own webcam before they could change their mind.

Amethyst had been looking down at herself, chuckling as she took in the entire girth of the dildo. Turning her gaze upwards, the one visible eye widened and her mouth dropped open. The dildo slipped out of her pussy with a loud 'pop'.

"You're a girl?!"


	5. Chapter 5

Mortified, Peridot quickly turned their camera off, leaving Amethyst to gape at a blank screen.

[Ur a girl?] Amethyst had abandoned the dildo to type this.

[They/them pronouns please.]

For once Peridot was glad to be misgendered because the slight annoyance had grounded them. Their heart was still fluttering but their thoughts and gut had calmed. They held their head, the surge of emotions, from apprehension, excitement, arousal, and jarring embarrassment had hit in fast progression. They reached for an ibuprofen in the drawer, head and heart pounding.

[Srry.] Amethyst apologized. [So ur not a guy. . . ?]

[I'm nonbinary.] Peridot crisply explained.

[Cool. What does it mean?]

Amethyst wasn't receptive to the sudden flood of information Peridot typed up but she was respectful enough, continuing to use the pronouns Peridot preferred.

[Srry. That wordy junk goes over my head. But I think I get it.]

Amethyst's camera was off now, they were both conversing solely through text. Peridot realized this was different than past interactions with Amethyst, not only because of this but because they were actually talking. And not about food or burps, or sex. And not about Amethyst. For the first time the focus was on Peridot. The attention was exhilarating though Peridot suspected Amethyst would get bored soon. But she didn't. She continued to ask questions, about what Peridot had for dinner, what they did for fun. . .

In a way, it reminded Peridot of the two dates they had been on recently. Talking. Getting to know each other.

And even though Amethyst did tease them a little, calling them a nerd after they mentioned coding, it was all in good jest. The winkie face was a testament to that.

Looking at the time, Peridot realized they had been talking for over an hour and a half. Amethyst must have also seen this, for she said:

[Hey. If u want I can give u a refund. U know. . .since the show was cut short.]

[Keep it.]

[Seriously?}

[Yes.] Peridot replied simply and then, admitted quickly, nervous. [I just wanted your company. Thank you.] It was more than Peridot could ask for.

They wished they could do it again, but Peridot doubted they would

X

The conversation with Amethyst stayed with Peridot the rest of the week. Afterwards there was little that could frustrate Peridot, at work being singled out by their colleagues, or at home button mashing while dealing with a spotty internet connection during a game. Those things could rile them up on even a small scale but thinking of that small moment with Amethyst they found they couldn't stay mad.

Even when their car broke down, they took it in remarkable stride, using a minimum of three curse words. Lapis was surprised too. Even more surprising was when Lapis grudgingly accepted to take the vehicle in while Peridot was at work. Peridot had been sure they would have to bribe their room mate and was suspicious that it hadn't come to that, but then, Lapis had looked out for them, making sure they ate last week. Peridot was making changes in their life, it was possible Lapis was doing that same.

But Peridot realized they had been wrong when fifteen minutes before work ended Lapis snuck in beside their work cubicle and played a symphonic procession of fart noises, loud enough for the entire floor to hear.

Everyone had shot glares in Peridot's direction, many covering their noses, some flat out leaving the building fifteen minutes early.

Peridot left soon after, feeling their remaining co-worker's vexed stares.

"I can never show my face there again!" Peridot shouted, meeting Lapis at the door.

"Come on, they were fart noises, Peri." Lapis gently teased.

"Except for the last two!"

Lapis's eyebrows raised, impressed. "Wow. Those were the loudest ones."

"I know!" They both got in the car, Peridot slamming the door shut. Immediately, they noticed the seat was too far from the wheel. This was why Peridot preferred repairing the car themselves and didn't like to loan the car to Lapis. It always meant they'd have to adjust the seat later. Even then that wasn't enough.

"Where's my pillow?" Peridot craned their neck, searching the backseat.

Lapis handed it to them, snickering as Peridot laid it on the driver's seat and sat down, wiggling .

"You're so short."

"All right, Captain Obvious, what could I possibly have done to deserve this?"

Lapis leaned the passenger's seat all the way back as Peridot started the car. "You disrupted me at work, thought you should know what it's like."

Peridot gripped the steering wheel. "Wait. How do you know I -"

The taller woman rolled her eyes, "you were talking in your sleep the other day. I was poking you, checking to see that you didn't die when you said you found 'it'. So I asked you what you were talking about and you laughed like the little shit you are and told me you found the cam site I'm on.

"I said: 'hah. Good luck finding my username. ' and you cackled again, infuriatingly and said you already found that too. . . '

Lapis left off there. No more words were needed to say that she knew it was Peridot that had caused trouble that day. They rode in silence for a moment, and then, Peridot said:

"Why foot stuff?"

Lapis shrugged. Silence again, and then: "you owe me dinner. Stop at the Thai place on the way."

"You still owe me rent." Peridot retorted, but took the next turn towards the Thai restaurant anyways. Lapis thought she had won, as she often did. Perhaps she had, in a small way, because at the mention of Thai food, Peridot thought about Pho and could think of nothing else to have for dinner that night.


	6. Chapter 6

Peridot grappled with the temptation to buy another one-on-one show with Amethyst, because while they were comfortable financially, they were not made of money.

This was how it started, they thought. Except that the anti-drug program at their school had warned the class about heroin and various other substances. "One hit is all it takes to be an addict." However, the officer volunteering that day hadn't warned them about camgirls or how a tiny bit of attention could be addictive.

Not that Peridot was typically ignored. Their mom called every evening when she was certain Peridot was awake, and on the Camp Pining Hearts forums they had a sort of social standing (if they were being modest). And Lapis was a good friend, even though she paid the rent late.

But Peridot wanted more, not from those people– maybe Lapis– just… someone.

The Stupid Cupid profile stayed up and the dates continued, but not much came out of it other than more practice. Peridot was learning the game and experimented, finding they could win it. They had kissed Julia, a brunette, tinier than them, in the garden, and the next day, smoothly slipped their hand in Sara's, each finger encircled with gold rings.

But winning the game, while surprisingly easy, was dull and had no heart. None of those women sparked the same feelings Peridot felt when Lapis stretched and looked over her shoulder, or when Amethyst lay sprawled and lazy and laughing.

Gravity. There was no gravity.

Except when it came to those unattainable two.

Which was just Peridot's luck.

Peridot wondered how pathetic it was to buy someone's attention as the page loaded to Amethyst's room.

The screen to the video stream was blank. They were too early. There were a few already in the chat, talking amongst themselves about Amethyst. Peridot felt their gaze draw to the messages then shook their head. Reading through usually incited anger and caused them to question if they were no better than the others. Normally that thought process amounted to Peridot deciding they were the superior fan because they weren't merely interested in Amethyst's body.

"Sup." Amethyst's voice was present before the video finally loaded. She adjusted the camera and leaned forward, resting her chin on the heel of her hand. She was wearing pants for the first time on camera. She was shirtless to circumvent this, her rolls spilling over the waist of her jeans.

Her eyes were strangely distant, as if scanning the room, the usernames, the jargon the guests in the room used. It was like she was looking for someone in particular, hopeful. The moment passed quickly and she rolled onto her side. "So what's everyone up to, tonight? 'Sides watching me?"

She laughed that infectious laugh. Peridot pulled their blanket tighter around them, melting.

[Reading.] Leaving out that the material was fanfiction.

Few replied to the question, including Peridot. Most ignored it and demanded body parts. Amethyst in turn ignored them.

"Reading?!" She blew a raspberry flippantly, briefly curtailing the hair in her face. "Psh. Nerd."

Peridot smiled and quickly typed, [I'm not a nerd.]

Amethyst took the bait, grinning. "Uh, yeah. Yeah you are."

Did Amethyst know it was them? Peridot hoped, wondered, then shook their head. No. Don't look into it too much.

Still, that tiny bit of interaction felt genuine, like the last time they'd seen Amethyst, when it was just one-on-one. For a moment, Peridot felt like the only person in the room. The illusion was quickly broken when Amethyst regarded another guest, laughing so hard she was clutching her bare sides and snorting.

From the corner of their eye, a notification blipped. It was one of their friends from the Camp Pining Hearts forums.

[The site is down. Can you fix it?]

[Yeah. Looking at it now.] A reluctant reply.

Peridot expected it to be an easy fix, but the estimated fifteen minutes dragged on to an hour and a half. It was one of those pesky layered problems.

An hour later, Peridot finally fixed the website and the forums were active again at the expense of missing Amethyst's camshow.

Which was a perfect excuse to buy another private session together with Amethyst. They checked their bank balance and then messaged her. Unlike before, there wasn't a quick response but that was to be expected. It was almost five.

"I should be waking up in an hour." They often questioned why they did this to themselves. It was like their mind and body were two separate entities forced to work together. Their body demanded rest but their mind was anxious and active, thinking of all the things they could be doing instead of sleeping.

This was why there was coffee.

Which Peridot could smell, freshly brewing downstairs.

They went down the steps to investigate and found Lapis sitting on the kitchen counter, staring pensively into her clownfish cup.

"I couldn't sleep," she explained. There was a pile of papers, bags of chips, and bread behind her. Everything that had been sitting on the counter that had been in her way was shoved to the side.

"So you made coffee…?"

"Yeah." Lapis took a sip. "I gave up trying. What about you?"

Peridot paused, glancing towards the electronic clock attached to the stove. "Yeah, me too," they said, and fetched their alien mug from the dishwasher. After adding enough sugar and cream to unsettle Lapis, judging by her look, Peridot joined her on the counter, taking the offered hand of assistance.

Staying up past reason, drinking coffee, with the obligations of waking life hovering above them, it felt like college again: Lapis doing everything but her art project (until the very last minute) and Peridot up all night gaming or doing homework. Often Lapis had seized Peridot the moment they were free to help her with her art projects. Peridot would make a show of how much Lapis was inconveniencing them, though they had never truly minded. It gave them an excuse to be creative, and they liked working together with Lapis, with their hands.

A question pressed against Peridot's lips, but like the murky status of their (maybe) relationship, they chose not to voice it.

Ever since she had graduated, Lapis hadn't been able to utilize her degree, and lately Peridot had noticed she had stopped drawing.

Peridot wanted to ask, but sensed it would be like prodding an open wound.

Chips and plastic wrap crinkled as Lapis shifted on the cramped counter space, making an observation of her own. "You've been holed up in your room a lot lately. More than usual."

Not exactly true. When Peridot went out on dates with the women she met through Stupid Cupid, it was typically before four in the evening. The fact that this was when Lapis was asleep may have been a carefully planned coincidence.

"What have you been up to?"

Peridot drank their coffee. If they opened their mouth and tried to lie it would start out with, "Well, I certainly haven't been pining over a camgirl that works on the same site as you…"

Given some thought, they came up with something to say after swallowing. "I spent all night fixing the website."

Lapis nodded, familiar with their work on the Camp Pining Hearts website. In its heyday, Lapis had also been a forum member before her interest trickled out. There wasn't much that Lapis was interested in anymore, it seemed.

The mug cupped in Peridot's hands was slipping, palms sweaty at the thought that Lapis might ask, "And what else have you been up to?"

But she didn't.

Instead, "Do you still have the series on DVD?"

"Peh. As if I would throw those away– even season five."

"I like season five." Lapis's eyes glinted mischievously.

"Don't push your luck, Lazuli." Peridot gently swatted at her foot with theirs. "Why do you ask?"

Lapis shrugged. "You want to watch an episode or two?" Peridot knew the risk – 'a few episodes' often ended up being an entire season, but nodded anyway.

Five episodes later and Peridot was rushing to get dressed for work. They brushed their teeth, forgot to brush their hair, but their hair was a mess even when they tried. This pattern persisted throughout the day, scrambling to do one thing, half-assing or forgetting another.

After no rest, a long hour and a half on their ass fixing the glitches plaguing the Camp Pining Hearts forums, and chugging enough coffee to raise a dead body, and work on top of that, Peridot was exhausted before noon. They wanted nothing more than to take a nap but didn't dare risk it, sure they would sleep through their alarm, drool pooling around their face, cheek flat on the desk.

They didn't understand. Just five years ago they could have seamlessly charged through the day after an all-nighter.

But that was when they were in their early twenties, in college.

"I'm getting old," Peridot groaned and tried not to cry or fall asleep on their keyboard.

The entire day, they fantasized about falling into bed but when they came home, shucking off their bag and shoes and trading work slacks for UFO patterned pajama pants, they fully intended to. But then they made the mistake of parking in front of their computer to check their email.

A new message from Amethyst, among three natural male enhancement ads, and an article a friend had sent with the subject line, 'LOL.'

Shaking, probably because they were tired, Peridot gathered control to delete the spam mail and read their friend's message before Amethyst's. Save the best for last– or rather gather a thread of restraint. The prospect of spending more time with Amethyst was stronger than any energy drink. Peridot's heart pounded and a surge of adrenaline jolted through her, washing away the fatigue.

Within the message, Amethyst had provided two available time slots, with a note that there was no guarantee she would be awake.

Peridot glanced at the time on the bottom corner of their screen. It was five minutes past one of the times Amethyst had suggested. But then, when was Amethyst on time? And she had said herself that it would be a toss-up whether she'd be awake.

With quick courage– or stupidity– Peridot asked: [Are you available now?] , knowing they would regret another late night.

If Amethyst didn't respond, they'd take that as a sign to get some damn rest.

But Amethyst responded quickly, with a simple, [Yeah.] And shortly after, the Skype icon on their toolbar blipped bright orange.

Peridot knew better, but it was like the promise of a few Camp Pining Hearts episodes. They just couldn't resist.


	7. Chapter 7

"So what kind of movie did you want to watch?" Amethyst asked. They were strictly on voice chat, per Peridot's request.

Their response was delayed, dazed, surprised that Amethyst's hadn't laughed when Peridot asked to watch a movie. Peridot could have asked Amethyst to bend over and fuck both her holes on camera and moan Peridot's name. They could have asked a lot from Amethyst, who had done enough on screen to give the impression she had no limits.

But of all things, Peridot had asked if Amethyst wanted to watch a movie, when Lapis was downstairs, likely doing nothing at all. And Lapis was physically here, unlike Amethyst. But unlike Lapis, Amethyst was open to romantic companionship, even if it was all for show. It felt nice to pretend, though in the back of their mind, Peridot wondered if they would get a sticky, icky feeling for doing this.

Peridot abhorred the word 'normal' in most cases. In this case, in regards to romantic companionship, Peridot wanted to be normal, to have an actual girlfriend. Not a surrogate.

"What do you like to watch?" Peridot tentatively asked, still shy of speaking on mic.

"I asked you first." Amethyst challenged.

There was a pause, and then, Peridot shyly admitted, under their breath: "documentaries."

And in the inner workings of their head, also thought: _and romantic comedies_. But didn't dare mention that. They'd take Amethyst calling them a nerd over a sap.

Amethyst didn't sound so keen about watching a documentary and was more receptive to voicing what she'd like to watch. Her first pick was a gory B grade horror movie. Peridot lied and said they'd already seen it before.

Amethyst's second pick was a Buddy Cop movie starring a famous obnoxious comedian. She confessed she'd watched it eight times already but Peridot wouldn't have been able to tell otherwise; she wouldn't stop laughing. Peridot spent the entire movie with their brows bunched together, scrutinizing the jokes that flew over their head, laughing, forced, and wondering if they should be laughing.

This wasn't as fun as they thought it would be. They had gone into this expecting it not to be the same as watching a movie with Lapis, but not like this.

The interaction with Amethyst, watching movies felt forced, like they were walking on eggshells, trying to find the right way to impress her. A ridiculous worry. A relationship with Amethyst was an impossible dream. But some part of Peridot wondered that if they said the right things and laughed at all the right jokes, if Amethyst would bridge the gap between them. Peridot felt she would- for the right price. But that wasn't the same, it wasn't what they wanted.

"You don't like the movie" Amethyst stated more than asked, more than halfway through.

Peridot chewed their bottom lip, tried to say something, couldn't say anything.

"Let's watch something you like." Amethyst said.

[Are you sure?] Peridot preferred to type.

[Yah. This is for u nerd. So if you gotta nerd out- do it. Let's watch that documentary.]

[But you'll get bored.]

[Then pick out something u think we'll both liek.]

Peridot exited out of the movie and browsed through their Netflix list. There was that series that came up in their recommendations after watching the Camp Pining Hearts movie. Of course, their first choice would be for the latter but Netflix had recently removed it, leaving. .

[Want to watch Lil' Butler?]

Amethyst chuckled darkly at that and suddenly her camera was on, her face close to the monitor. A shit eating grin stretched full lips and she stared into the camera's eye dead on, serious.

"Do it."

Peridot was about to start up the first episode when Amethyst stopped them, "oh! Start at season three! That's the best one- don't worry, you don't have to watch the show in order to get it."

And as Peridot started to peruse season three Amethyst stopped them again. She was still on camera and pointing wildly.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! Ya gotta play the beach episode. That one's a riot!"

Peridot smiled, her enthusiasm was contagious. As they started up the aforementioned beach episode, they hoped it would be better than the movie.

And while it wasn't Camp Pining Hearts, it was almost as enjoyable, if not more than the movie they had tried to watch initially.

It was getting late but at the end of each episode Amethyst would say they had to watch the next one, and so forth. This went on until Peridot fell asleep at their computer, the episode where Lil' Butler competes in a drag race playing in the background along with Amethyst's throaty laugh.

Then there was silence, and Amethyst's breathing. Lot of keyboard sounds and mouse clicks. Shuffling in the chair.

At six in the morning their alarm clock cut through the extraneous noises like a lightning strike, jolting Peridot awake.

Falling asleep at their computer wasn't strange, in fact expected.

"Heeey Sleepy head."

Amethyst's voice, greeting them was not.

Peridot jumped out of their chair and hurriedly tried to fix their hair (always a lost cause) and wipe the drool from the corner of their mouth with the back of their hand.

Shit.

Okay. Maybe it was a good sign that Amethyst was still on call but of all things, why did Peridot have to fall asleep on call? Fuck. Did they snore? Or masturbate furiously in their sleep like Lapis claimed they did?

And there were crusties in the corners of their eyes and a red mark on their cheek where they'd rested against their palm.

How unattractive.

Peridot dipped out of view from the eye of their camera and straightened out their shirt, and again tried to fix their hair. They scowled at the face of their computer screen, as if blaming it for embarrassing them, and as they shot that dirty look, noticed that the blue dot that signaled camera broadcast was dim.

In a flash, they remembered that they hadn't used their camera at all last night. Just Amethyst.

So Amethyst hadn't seen them wake up a disaster, just heard them fumble and squeal, and fall flat on their face. Again, how unattractive.

"You there?" Amethyst called out, voice alluring. Peridot's nose was runny and they muffled a sharp sniff. Then they coughed, phlegm thick in their throat. Allergies.

"Yeah." Peridot replied quickly, one hand on the mouse, the other searching the desk for their allergy medication.

"Did you really stay on call all night?" They asked, flabbergasted.

"Yep." Amethyst was smug, beaming. "I heard everything."

An: 'oh no' slipped past their lips and they quickly covered their mouth, imagining the horrifying details Amethyst was about to share.

"You snore in your sleep." Amethyst said, and then, rolling over, her top hiking up: "I've never had anyone fall asleep on me. Normally I'm the one that conks out on call."

Peridot recalled the second time they'd seen her show. "Yes, however unlike me you add a little panache to that behaviour."

"Oh yeah?"

Peridot thought about a fluffy himalayan cat their grandma had that liked to perch on a pile of shredded documents because that's where the sun shone through the window. Like a cat. That's what Amethyst was: queen of the jungle, moving at her leisure, body spread over her hoard.

Peridot almost voiced this but their alarm went off again and this time Lapis banged on the door, demanding rather than asking if they were going to turn the damn alarm off "anytime soon".

"I have to get ready for work." Peridot said in a rush and exited the call. Before they could reach their phone Lapis trudged through their room and took care of it, throwing their phone back at them before stomping back to bed.

They fumbled the catch but the phone landed safely on their pillow. Five minutes past six the clock read. Peridot sighed and scratched the back of their head furiously.

Their morning routine was rushed and hushed, moving quickly but keeping their footfalls soft for Lapis sleeping upstairs. She did eventually emerge for the promise of fresh brewed coffee and seemed to forgive Peridot for waking her after that, enough to stall them before they bolted out the door.

"Your shirt is inside out." She commented. "And your bowtie is crooked." She fixed that.

Peridot swatted her hand away, "I'll fix it later! I have to go- " Quick glance at the clock. "I'm running late!"

They ran out the door, tripping over their feet, flat on their face, inches from the car.

It was going to be another long day.


	8. Chapter 8

"Are we going to watch more Lil' Butler?" Amethyst asked a few days later. A Saturday night. Peridot was well rested and had asked (in what their co-workers thought an amazing turn of events) to not be added to the on-call roster this weekend.

"No." Peridot said, shaking their head.

Amethyst was on camera and looked disappointed at that but not completely disinterested, eyes still focused on the screen, perhaps on Peridot,

Peridot had after some pull from Amethyst turned on their webcam, but not before wrestling with their hair and brushing their teeth. They were wearing their best shirt, another souvenir from Roswell, New Mexico that an online friend had gifted them. The alien was wearing sunglasses.

"I was thinking. . ." Peridot started. [We could play a game together.]

Amethyst's eyes flashed, her upper lip quirked up. "Oh yeah?"

[Do you have Steam?]

[Oh.]

Peridot paused. [What does that mean?] A second ago, Amethyst had seemed interested.

[That kind of game.]

Peridot swallowed.

Oh.

They hid their blush with the heel of their hand, turning away slightly. And then, they pushed their glasses back up their nose by the bridge. Clearing their throat, they continued. [Just one game. If you don't like it we'll watch another episode of Lil' Butler.]

Amethyst liked those odds and Peridot had offered to buy her the game. Within twenty minutes the game was downloaded and they were ready to play.

Peridot explained the controls, was disheartened that Amethyst blew them off in game and did her own thing. It seemed that Amethyst was dead set on watching Lil' Butler as soon as possible but after the first game (one they had lost), Amethyst asked Peridot if they were ready to join another match.

Like the Lil' Butler episodes, the matches were continuous. One more became ten more and the longer they played together, the more Peridot found that Amethyst was the type who learned by jumping in head first. Of course,they may have won more games if Amethyst had just listened to their tutorial spiel but she was learning, and watching how Peridot played some of the characters and would later mimic their strategy.

They were just about to start another match when Amethyst said, "hey. My roommate just got home. Want her to join? She's a nerdo about this game."

That was promising. They were having fun with Amethyst but it would be nice to win a few rounds.

[Sure.]

In five minutes, a player by the name of Thorn entered the group. Their icon was a rose, highlighted in teal.

Privately, Amethyst said: [Don't tell her how we met, ok?]

Peridot nodded and dragged their thumb and forefinger over their lips to prove they would be sealed.

[She doesn't know?]

Amethyst rolled her eyes. [She knows. But she thinks I stopped- that I'm making an honest living at the 7 11 . Whatever. She used to be a stripper so it's not like she doesn't get it.]

[Why do you do it?] It was a question Peridot had wanted to ask, but never saw an opening, or worried it would sour their good graces with Amethyst.

[At first it was just for money, u know? But it's a lot of fun. The money IS nice. I like the attention.]

[Have you ever declined a private session?]

[Oh yeah. Some people are . . .] She shrugged, smiling lopsided. [You've been in my chatroom. U know how some of them get.]

They nodded.

[I only do 1 on 1 dealies with ppl that aren't lame. Well, ur still a nerd. But ur not so bad I guess.]

[Excuse me. Are we going to play or not? Amethyst?] Thorn cut in on the team chat speak, oblivious to their private conversation on Skype.

"Geez, P!" On camera, Amethyst was shouting at the wall and Peridot assumed the infamous roommate was on the other side. "We were just getting set up."

There was a muffled reply, one only Amethyst could hear. On chat Thorn told them to hurry.

"She always gets like this." Amethyst huffed. "It's always: 'let's not dawdle, Amethyst.' or 'Amethyst-' "

[I can hear you.] Thorn said, and then addressing Peridot: [PercexPierre4ever, may I add another person to the group?]

[Call me Peridot. And yes, an additional member would be excellent.]

[Hold on, it will be awhile.]

" 'A while'?!" Amethyst groused, folding her arms, squinting in the direction of her roommate's residence, off to the right. "Just a second ago you were nagging at us!"

Peridot agreed but couldn't disagree that another teammate would be worth waiting for. So they waited, almost twenty minutes, filling in the silence by explaining their screenname in a wall of text. Thorn didn't respond to it, just Amethyst who winked and said they were looking forward to Peridot's in-depth analysis of Lil' Butler.

[You're playing a game when you finally found a new victim to watch that show with?] Thorn typed. [That's surprising.]

"We're going to watch another episode after a few matches."

[Isn't it late already?] Thorn was clearly experienced with Amethyst's binge watching habits. [Nevermind, Bismuth is ready.]

Peridot started out of their seat. [Wait. Bismuth?!]

A user with the handle 'ThisMeansBismuth' joined the group and Peridot hopped out of their seat, hands flat on their desk, shuddering in disbelief at their screen.

And they were still on voice chat with Amethyst who raised a brow and said, concerned. "You all right, Peri-pants?"

"THE Bismuth?! THE Bismuth!" Peridot's voice quaked, volume escalating. "I-I didn't think anything of it when your roommate joined under the name Thorn. . ." They were rushing, sputtering, ecstatic. "I mean- it's a common username. After what happened on the Vescade servers she and Rose were heroes! A lot of people started taking on similar usernames after that- even I did at one time. So I thought it was just another fan. . but But. . ."

Peridot panted hard over their keyboard, catching their breath.

"I wasn't around then but I've heard some stuff."

Catching their breath, Peridot hoarsely whispered, "you HAVE to tell me about all of this 'STUFF'."

Amethyst shrugged, "sure thing, Peri-pear. But we got a game and an entire season of Lil' Butler to watch first."

"We're watching a whole season tonight?!" Peridot croaked. Thorn had been right: it was late even by their standards. Peridot had always been that friend who stayed awake the entire night during sleepovers, everyone else fast asleep surrounding them, and was often the friend who begged someone to stay up just a bit longer because the RP was -just- getting interesting.

Amethyst slept a lot, that was true. But she was equally capable of staying up, continually proving to Peridot that she possessed more stamina than them.

[Are you two ready yet?] Thorn asked impatiently.

[Hey, Amethyst. Finally going to show us your stuff?] Bismuth added.

They switched to voice chat. Thorn's voice was prim and arrogant, and annoying not like the online hero Peridot had imagined at all. Bismuth's timbre was deep, vibrant and encouraging, just what Peridot expected from someone who coached teams. Through all seven games Peridot's hands were shaking over the controls. They messed up more times than they could count and kicked themselves for doing so in front of the infamous two.

They won six out of the seven matches. Peridot apologized for doing poorly, but Bismuth assured that they had done more than fine. The sentiment stayed with Peridot the rest of the night as they watched the rest of season four of Lil' Butler with Amethyst.

"We're watching more next time." Amethyst said, still bright eyed and bushy tailed at eight in the morning.

This time Peridot managed to exit the call before they fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Somehow after that, Peridot lost track when, it became a ritual to watch Li'l Butler and play videogames with Amethyst. The pretense of payment was lost along the way. Initially, Peridot felt guilty, but it was always Amethyst who initiated these activities, who asked if they wanted to watch another episode, who wanted to stay up until five playing online matches.

It felt too good to be true. Like the stray touches Lapis gave them, Peridot didn't question it, waiting for another sign or just hoping not to ruin a good thing.

The months following were exhausting, Peridot lost more sleep than usual, but they felt it was all worth it and soldiered through. Eventually, they became used to it and could subsist on only four hours of sleep. Their coworkers teased them about finding a boyfriend (yeah right) in response to their working weekends only once a month now instead of every weekend.

The only thing Peridot couldn't get out of that was work-related was a conference on the west coast.

"So I won't be online then," Peridot said glumly, killing an enemy sniper in game.

"Where did you say this conference thing was?" Amethyst asked distractedly, then groaned. Peridot had watched her character die from the corner of their eye, leaving just them and a healer at the waypoint.

"The West Coast Plaza," Peridot divulged. "In California."

Amethyst paused. She had already respawned but she wasn't directing her character towards the battlefield.

"That's pretty close to where I live," she said, and in that instant, Peridot's character stepped on a landmine and died.

"Really?" they asked, breathless, circling Amethyst's character in the spawn room. In the game chat the other people in their group complained about the two players who were too busy goofing around.

Peridot didn't care about winning for once. "Are you sure?"

"Uh, yeah. I pass by it all the time on my way to the gas station."

Peridot licked their lips, a proposal attempting to edge out of them. Amethyst beat them to it.

"Want to hang out?"

"Yes!" There was no hesitation. The game had long finished and they had both lost their rank. They exited out of the game to make plans immediately, which Peridot found touching because Amethyst typically didn't plan things, based on Thorn's complaints in-game.

"You can stay at my place- well, me, Garnet, and P. Oh! And little Stevie!"

Peridot assumed the latter was the cat that often drifted in and out of Amethyst's room.

"That won't be necessary," Peridot politely declined. As much as they very much wanted to spend the night at Amethyst's, they didn't want to intrude. If it was just her and one roommate that would be one thing, but they knew personally from boarding school that more than three was a crowd. Sometimes more than two.

"I have a hotel room." It was paid for by the company.

Amethyst grinned at that. "Even better."

Peridot reddened, afraid to ask why that was. Amethyst changed the subject.

"So when you get here, I'm taking you to Aqua Mexican, and then..."

And suddenly a conference they didn't want to go to couldn't come soon enough. Two weeks. Every day they and Amethyst would excitedly talk about it, Amethyst waxing on about all the places she'd take Peridot to eat, and how they'd watch Lil Butler together, curled up in bed.

"I can't wait to meet you," Peridot confessed, and stopped themself right there.

They wondered if Amethyst had blushed at that, but her sheet of hair was in the way, and also the delivery Lapis had ordered had arrived.

After tipping the delivery boy, Peridot set the Chinese take-out on the table, still thinking about the trip. As they opened a box, discovering Lapis's order of crab rangoons instead of their own fried rice, Peridot considered telling their roommate their plans.

Lapis was expecting for Peridot to be out of town in the next two days, but they didn't know about Amethyst.

Peridot chewed a hangnail. Their relationship with Lapis was still up in the air, as usual.

It was possibly too late to bring it up at this point. They had already gone on dates with other women, and had started to cultivate a friendship with Amethyst that held a promising possibility.

Peridot shook their head. Was that really why they wanted to say something? It was a myriad of things, honestly.

Lapis padded over to Peridot and retrieved her box of crab rangoons from them. "Thanks," she said, and started for the fridge for something to drink.

"Lapis."

"Yeah?" She was face first in the fridge, the box of food cradled under her free arm.

Peridot inhaled sharply. Tried to say something. Wheezed. Then tried again.

"Want me to grab your allergy medication?"

They shook their head. They had to speak now or they'd lose their pluck.

"So, I'm going to be out of town next week."

"Yeah, I know," Lapis deadpanned.

Playing with the thread of their sweatshirt, Peridot added, "I'm going to be staying with someone- maybe! The hotel is a sure thing, but-" They laughed nervously, a touch of their excitement coming loose. "-I might not even need to use it!"

Lapis raised an eyebrow, shifting on her feet impatiently. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because!" Peridot started, and quickly paused. They knew why, but were unsure how to put it into words. They had come up with speeches that were essay- or ballad-length, but they'd crumbled them all up. Words in their most concise form were often more effective.

Peridot couldn't bring themself to say anything more than simply this, "Because- don't you care?"

It pained them to watch Lapis's blank expression morph into a cold, guarded one.

"We're friends," she replied cautiously, fingers pressing into the white take-out container.

Peridot nervously fidgeted, "But we still... you still kiss me, Lazuli." And then Peridot was afraid. Afraid Lapis would stop kissing them, stop sidling close to them on the couch as they both watched a movie, and afraid she would now deny Peridot's thumb grazing her pulsepoint.

The shared affection wasn't unpleasant and Peridot didn't want it to stop. But the ambiguity behind it was more than torture-

It was just cruel.

"Nothing's changed," Peridot said quietly, shaking.

Lapis was still, and then she moved slowly, obviously rattled, one arm crossed over her chest.

"Can't friends do those things?"

"It's confusing me."

Lapis slowly peeled her gaze from the floor and met Peridot's eyes. She seemed stricken by the gesture, as if it had been a mistake to do that. She stepped back, and now her voice was watery, so low Peridot couldn't hear.

She repeated herself, a little louder. "I'll stop then."

"You don't have to."

Lapis's head shot up. "Then why?"

Why, why, they both knew why. Peridot turned their head away. "I need to know... so I can move on, Lazuli."

"Then go," she said, dark, quiet, dissonant. She left without the rest of her dinner, leaving Peridot with a dozen to-go containers, without closure.

X

The to-go boxes were stowed away in the fridge unopened. Peridot did not have an appetite. It was that kind of grief.

Climbing up the stairs, they were faced with Lapis's room, the door closed, just like it had been two years ago. Lapis preferred her privacy but normally left the door cracked open for Peridot. To see it closed and uninviting was disheartening.

They rushed past the closed door before they could consider knocking, making things worse. Their room was at the end of the hallway, only a few more paces, but somehow tonight the hallway seemed to stretch and twist and it took forever for them to reach their room.

Closing the door behind them, they found Amethyst still on call, waiting for them,

Peridot jolted like they had found a stranger in their room- or had been caught crying. They wiped their shirt sleeve across their eyes. It came away damp.

"You all right?" Amethyst asked.

"Allergies." It was a white lie that Amethyst saw through, asking not angrily, but concerned:

"Then why're you standing there being all sad like that?!"

She softened. "I mean, we're going to get to see each other next week. What's there to be sad about?"

Peridot smiled. "You're right." They settled in their computer chair.

They continued to talk about their plans for the trip and played a few rounds of online gaming. After an hour, not even past midnight, Peridot said they were going to bed.

The call ended after they both said goodnight and Peridot started out of their seat to brush their teeth when a new notification from Skype made a noise. Still standing, they leaned forward to see the new message.

[U gonna b alright?]

Before Peridot could respond, another message.

[If u want to talk about it we can. I just figured u wanted to forget about it. Idk that's what i want when shit hits the fan.]

Peridot's thumb grazed the spacebar. They did want to talk about it, but not now, maybe later, after some rest.

They thanked Amethyst, said goodnight again, and then went to bed.


	10. Chapter 10

In the morning there was fresh coffee in the pot but no Lapis. It was strange for either of them to wake up early on a weekend, except when they were upset about something.

Peridot felt better than they did two years ago, and Amethyst left them better than they were last night, but they still woke up at seven. Not exactly chipper. Hopeful, maybe.

Peridot put on a pair of shorts and sneakers and carried the coffee outside with them. Better to go outside than further the mood of isolation holed up in their room. Lapis was probably waiting for them to leave, so she could leave her room again. Peridot wished they could just talk.

Amethyst offered to hear out Peridot's problems, but they were unsure if they wanted to divulge. They trusted her, but they also liked her. One of the things Peridot learned from a few bad dates is that it was annoying to talk about the ex.

They pulled out their phone and checked on the Camp Pining Hearts forums, searching for the vent subforum. They found a place to sit, cool brick against their backside, and spilled their guts publicly online. Because that made sense.

Most of their fellow forum members, especially the co-mods, were familiar with Peridot's history with Lapis. Their friends were there when the relationship reached its peak and descended into a low. They had helped Peridot through the breakup when the programmer had no one else to talk to.

[You're STILL living with her?] was one of the first replies.

[Shut up.]

The rest of the responses were less admonishing. Many were sympathetic. A few gave their two cents. Peridot wasn't sure if they wanted to take the advice, but they felt less alone in the world.

They pocketed their phone and watched birds flit back and forth among the trees, building nests, hopping and singing. They drank the rest of their coffee in this peace.

X

Late in the evening they returned home, after making a trip to the computer store and running a few other errands they had been putting off.

The house seemed empty, quiet. The door accidentally slammed behind them and Peridot wondered what Lapis made of that.

They deposited their purchases on the floor of their room and turned on their computer monitor. They started up a video game playlist to help them concentrate but as soon as Amethyst called they knew their project was doomed to stay on the floor in pieces.

[You alright?] she asked.

"Yes. I was just about to build something."

"Can I watch?"

"Really?"

Amethyst shrugged. Peridot tilted the camera to face the floor and sat down, spreading out their tools.

"Whatcha making?"

"A robot."

"Cool– what's it going to do?"

Peridot turned a part over in their hands. "I'm not sure yet," they admitted.

Amethyst asked if they always build robots and Peridot said sometimes they did. They showed off the first blueprint they had ever made, lifting up the back of their shirt, exposing their left shoulder but careful to not reveal their chest.

Amethyst whistled, and laughed bemusedly. "Never took you for the type to be tatted up."

"I'll have you know I'm full of surprises." Peridot smirked and pulled up the sleeve of their sweatshirt, revealing a circuit board tattoo on their left inner wrist.

"Niiiice!"

"I got the first when I started college. The one here…" They waved their arm. "Was a graduation present to myself."

"Gonna get any more?"

"I don't think so." Peridot wanted to continue the theme of celebration. Not that they hadn't had any victories lately, but none that garnered another tattoo. And they were told by several sources that they shouldn't get a tattoo of Percy and Pierre tongue wrestling so Peridot was brainstorming something better than that.

"Want to see mine?"

Peridot's eyebrows shot up. If Amethyst had tattoos, they ought to know already after seeing her naked so often.

Of course, now that Amethyst was presenting her backside, Peridot realized they'd never seen her from that angle. They watched as she lifted the hem of her shirt, showing off a pouncing purple puma on her lower back.

"Like it?" She looked over her shoulder with an enticing smirk. Peridot wanted to ask her to shed the rest of her clothes. Amethyst wouldn't have minded, they knew, but the request fell back down their throat.

"Yes!" They straightened, sweating.

Amazing how earlier today they had been in a glum mood. Amethyst had that power– she didn't like to see other people be sad.

When they reached a good point in the project, Peridot set it aside and moved to their computer chair. Amethyst found a funny Craigslist post in Lost Connections and shared it with Peridot. From there the topic of dating came up, and Peridot let slip that they had a Stupid Cupid profile.

"I tried that place once.." Amethyst leaned back. She was playing with a roll of bubble wrap. "Waste of time. No one wants to actually meet up."

Peridot refrained from mentioning that they had successfully set up several dates using the site. Their curiosity was stronger than the need to show off. "Can I see your profile?"

Amethyst looked surprised. "Sure, yeah. Pretty sure I was too lazy to delete it. Look for mi-Torta1976. "

As Peridot typed in the username, Amethyst asked for theirs. Peridot was hesitant, but after some prodding and persuasive ass wiggling from the woman, Peridot muttered the screen name they used.

They actually held back reading Amethyst's profile long after it had loaded, just to hear her reaction to theirs.

There was a lot of snorting, and chuckling, amplifying their anxiety. The butterflies in their belly circled like a whirlwind. They were caught between begging her not to laugh and the simple joy of making someone, especially someone you like, laugh. Peridot just hoped she wasn't laughing at them.

"Have you had any luck?" she asked.

"A little." Peridot replied modestly and started to peruse Amethyst's profile. It was just as they expected, sparse for the most part. Amethyst had taken the time to share her zodiac sign (Aries), religion (raised Catholic), and race (Filipino-Mexican-African American mix) but had been lazy in the other areas.

It seemed she took more time in selecting profile pictures. Peridot could tell from the camera angles she chose that Amethyst had tried to give a good first impression. There was one picture where she was wearing a wreath of flowers on her head, another in front of a mirror making a peace sign, and another of her laying down, her hair everywhere. And she was wearing makeup in the photos. Peridot had never seen her wear makeup.

Out of all the pictures, their favorite was the one where Amethyst's mouth was wide open, eating a sandwich. That felt more like Amethyst.

"I like that one," they pointed out.

Amethyst snorted, a lock of hair levitating for a moment. "Sure you do."

There wasn't much else to look at unless Peridot wanted to know if Amethyst liked cats or dogs or–

Peridot quickly scrolled up, searching for her relationship status. Single.

The smile was short-lived however. Next to her relationship status was Amethyst's sexuality. Peridot should have assumed it. Amethyst's fans were mostly straight men, but they had heard most camgirls were queer and Thorn, her roommate, was a lesbian.

Straight. Peridot quickly exited out of the window.

"You alright?" Amethyst seemed to have a talent for sensing Peridot's unease, or they were that transparent.

"No." Peridot didn't lie there, but did lie saying it was about what had happened yesterday.

The conference was in five days and Peridot was sure they would need that hotel room after all.


	11. Chapter 11

Their plane was set to leave at six thirty in the morning so Peridot decided they may as well not try to sleep, saving it for the plane.

They planned to leave the house at four and grab breakfast at the airport terminal. They had packed most of their belongings, but at two they were making the finishing touches and checking to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything. They had, but it was nothing too serious, just a toothbrush that they promptly stowed in the front pocket of their luggage.

They trudged up and down the stairs and were so used to Lapis's bedroom door firmly shut and so preoccupied with packing that they hadn't noticed it had been left open. Not until Lapis slipped out of her room and intercepted Peridot in front of their room.

"Gah!" Peridot jumped, dropping a few pairs of socks. Lapis bent to pick them up. Peridot watched, only half-believing because of course Lapis would want to make amends at the very last second.

She didn't apologize or mention their previous conversation, clearly embarrassed and avoidant of that topic. She wanted things to move on as before, without a quarrel, and felt the only way to do that was by pretending nothing had happened.

Peridot allowed her that because they didn't want to leave on a sour note. They would discuss things again on Monday- Tuesday if Peridot got jet lag.

"When does your plane leave?" Lapis asked conversationally.

"Sev.. six," Peridot replied. "Why?"

"I can drive you to the airport," Lapis offered.

"You're being awfully nice, Lazuli."

"Don't you think I've been awfully mean?"

"Less so than some."

Lapis tucked the socks in the crook of their arm and followed them to their room. She helped pack as much as cat did, that is, she 'supervised,' sprawled out on the bed, face supported by the heel of her hand, reading a comic book.

Occasionally, one of them would say something; in those moments she temporarily set the book down. It didn't look like much to an outside observer, but that was often how they enjoyed each other's company.

Peridot drove to the airport. Lapis would drive the car back home. They were not morning people and Peridot presumed Lapis hadn't slept at all either. So the drive was silent but not awkward. It was a warm companionable silence, occasionally punctuated by laughter, a comedy podcast playing in the background.

There was a moment that Peridot saw Lapis's hand begin to drift towards theirs, only to retreat, forlorn.

Peridot saw traces of the action again near the line to airport security as they began to say goodbye. Lapis bit her lip and looked like she wanted something but was afraid to act on it. Peridot knew what it was.

"You can hug me, Lazuli." And expressing this, they wrapped their arms around the tall, slender woman, who only hesitated for a second before returning the friendly embrace.

X

The plane ride was a solid four hours and felt a little bit like time travel due to the time zone difference.

They picked up their luggage from the conveyor belt and hailed a cab to the hotel. They had two hours to spare before the conference started. Peridot truly needed the time to decompress after the flight and to put on professional dress. In the line through airport security, they had passed a few business professionals in suits and knew the men and women were uncomfortable. One person had glanced at them with snide jealousy for wearing pajama pants and a loose fitting shirt and sneakers. There might have also been a touch of judgment, since their hair was in disarray and there were deep bags under their eyes, but it was true of everyone else who didn't have to go straight to a work meeting after landing.

In line for the hotel concierge desk, Peridot's phone buzzed. It was an email from Amethyst, asking if their plane had landed.

[I'm at the hotel now. Waiting in line.]

[Sweet! Want to grab breakfast?]

There were several floor-length mirrors in this hotel, both broadening the room and bolstering its image. Additionally, the mirrors showed Peridot that they were in no shape to make a good first impression.

[I have to get cleaned up first.]

[I think you look just fine.]

Peridot squinted at their phone. [What do you mean?]

[Look up.]

Waving at them from the entrance was Amethyst. In the flesh, her presence was surreal and Peridot suddenly felt they were dreaming. If it was a dream, they weren't going to fight it. [That's only because you're all the way over there. You can't see how tired I am.]

Peridot stared between their phone and Amethyst ten yards away, awaiting a response.

"I'm going to take a closer look!" Amethyst shouted from the other side of the room. The guests and the hotel workers seemed to have followed Amethyst's line of sight and suddenly Peridot felt like everyone was staring at them.

This increased tenfold as Amethyst dashed to meet them.

"Hey." She was panting slightly and was the only person Peridot had ever met who was the same height as them (children didn't count). She was the most dressed Peridot had ever seen her, wearing a baggy black, purple, and white flannel shirt and black jeggings. Her tennis shoes were worn, the left shoe wrapped with a strip of duct tape that flashed silver under the light.

And she was even prettier in person: large cat like eyes lined with winged eyeliner, long hair pulled back in a ponytail, her roots showing black under the platinum dye job.

Her infectious laugh drew Peridot back to where they were standing, in the hotel lobby, waiting in line to check in.

"Earth to Peri-saurus Rex! It's your turn in line!"

Conscious of their temperature rising, they fumbled with their wallet and gave the concierge clerk their I.D. Then they turned their attention to Amethyst. For the first time, there wasn't a screen in between them or laggy Skype calls. Amethyst's voice was crisp and clear, and her hand, her everything, was just inches away.

She was real. Peridot didn't feel so real themself.

They scarcely remembered the clerk returning their I.D , the room key included. They did not recall walking to the room, head and stomach full of clouds. It was only when the door closed behind them and Peridot set their luggage on the bed that things made sense again, although, they were still convinced they were dreaming.

Amethyst was sitting on the bed, unabashed. This rubbed in the fact that the other woman was straight and only expected friendship between them. If there was a chance that Amethyst liked them, Peridot thought, then she would be just as shy as they were right now.

"Breakfast?" she asked.

"I still need to wash up." Peridot sighed. "And get dressed. I don't think I'll have time."

"I can go grab something," Amethyst offered. "I think I saw complimentary donuts downstairs." She sprang up and said she would be right back. Before she left, Peridot gave her the spare room key.

Peridot made sure to lock the bathroom door after confirming that all of the clothes they would need were in there with them. They undressed quickly, showered quicker, but Amethyst still beat them back. They heard the door to the room click from the other side and hurried up dressing.

As they dressed, they kept their back toward the mirror, looking up towards the ceiling. And when they emerged, Amethyst was sprawled on the bed again, this time with a paper tray full of donuts that she was already eating from.

She waved and said something, crumbs and sprinkles falling over the front of her shirt. Peridot was still in disbelief that she was here, on their bed. They had hoped the short passage of time would have helped them acclimate to this reality.

Nervously, they sat next to her, space between them. Amethyst handed them a donut with frosting stuffed with jam and something to drink.

"Orange juice?" Peridot wrinkled their nose, reading the label.

"What? You don't like O.J. ?"

"Don't you think the acidity of the orange juice tastes. . . unusual with the donuts?"

But of course, this was Amethyst. She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders, said offhandedly that Peridot sounded like someone she knew.

And then she turned on the TV and funneled through the channels until she found something interesting: pro wrestling.

"I've already seen this one," she said. "It's great."

Peridot felt the matches were longer than they needed to be. They did like watching the wrestlers' bright garish entrances and the commentary. More than that, they liked Amethyst's animated reactions. Occasionally, she mimicked a wrestler's moves without thinking, and more than once she accidentally swatted Peridot in the face.

"Sorry!" she apologized again.

Peridot shot their best scrutinizing look at her and then stuck out their tongue to show they were joking. Amethyst laughed and laughed. God, that laugh.

When they were out of donuts, Amethyst lowered the volume of the TV and turned to Peridot. She seemed fixated on something.

"You know, I can do your makeup for you before you leave."

Peridot snorted. "Makeup?"

"Just to cover up your dark circles. Remember when you said you looked dragged?"

"I don't really mind it."

"You wouldn't even let me look at you earlier."

Peridot almost blurted out that that was different.

"It won't be girly. Promise."

They might have fought it more if Amethyst hadn't taken them by the chin for a closer look.

"Gotta take these off first."

Amethyst allowed Peridot to take their glasses off and rummaged through her makeup bag.

Peridot watched her, hesitating, then set their glasses on the night stand next to the electronic clock, within reach.

Peridot couldn't see. That made them nervous. Then, Amethyst's touch was there again, and they became nervous in a different way.

Her touch was neither delicate or careless. It was rough, purposeful. Close. She was so close

Many times Peridot had wanted to reach through the screen and caress her, kiss her. Now they found they couldn't bring themselves to. All that pining, all those brazen thoughts, had just been that: thoughts.

They were content with Amethyst initiating physical contact, even if it was just to apply moisturizer, cream, and foundation to their face. The pads of Amethyst's fingers dolloped on cream similar enough to their skin tone. The makeup sponge made Peridot's nose twitch as it swiped over their face in long, clean stretches.

"Big Sis always said not to leave the house without makeup - not that I always listened."

"Are you implying I shouldn't?"

"Just makin' conversation, P."

And somewhere in the back of their mind, Peridot wondered if Amethyst was using this as an excuse to touch them. As that thought crept in, the memory of that bar of text on Amethyst's Stupid Cupid profile came to crush it.

Straight.

So then, Amethyst was just being helpful or bonding- as friends.

"All done," Amethyst announced.

Peridot put their glasses on and got up to look in the bathroom mirror. They did a slight double take. The person reflected there looked bright-eyed with clear skin and...

"I have eyebrows," Peridot whispered.

Amethyst nodded. "You have eyebrows. I filled them out a little. Eh, you don't really care how I did it, do you? So, want me to do your hair too? We still have time, right?"

"It's a lost cause. But yes, we do still have time so if you would like to make an attempt, you can."

Peridot sat back down and held their glasses in their lap. This time Amethyst sat behind them. Peridot's hair was still wet so Amethyst gently ran her fingers through their hair. There were no tangles to snag plump fingers and Amethyst said their hair was soft, "like duckfluff."

Amethyst's breath fell on the nape of their neck as she spoke and strands of dyed hair found a way to drape over Peridot's shoulder blades. She smelled like sweet, cinnamony funnel cake and when she spoke each syllable was flecked with laughter.

She rummaged through her makeup bag again, this time for a can of mousse. Peridot recoiled at the thought of something setting in their hair, but they wanted Amethyst to run her fingers through their hair again and so relented. It wasn't as bad as they thought. The mousse was soft and dissolved on contact.

It was over too soon after that. Amethyst drew back, slipping off the bed and walked around to face them.

"How do I look?" Peridot grinned. They had yet to see themselves in the mirror but they were positive of the outcome based on how Amethyst fixed her own hair. (She claimed she did 'jack shit' to her hair but Peridot was skeptical because it was long and soft. They could barely grow their own hair past their shoulders.)

"Terrible!" Amethyst barked.

"T-terrible?!" Peridot tensed. This was bad. They had to go to the conference in less than thirty minutes-

"I'm joking."

". . . Oh."

Peridot immediately put their glasses back on, more for their own comfort than to see what they looked like. Amethyst guided them with a push to the bathroom mirror to see.

Their hair was moderately tame, enough that Peridot noticed a difference.

"I call this look 'I just got laid' hair," Amethyst presented sagely.

Peridot colored, an image coming to mind. "Thanks. . .."

"Is that sarcasm?"

"N-No!" Peridot jumped to attention. "I guess I'm just speechless. I've never seen my hair this neat before."

Amethyst smiled, accepting the lie. Peridot had been thinking about what Amethyst had said and imagined the woman's hands in their hair again, tugging it, unintentionally styling it in the throes of passion. As if reading their expression, because Peridot was a poor liar, Amethyst stepped closer and cupped the back of their head, fingers threading through hair.

"You're going to mess it up," Peridot mumbled.

"Nuh uh. Just tweaking it a bit. . ." she murmured and Peridot thought her breath tasted sweet, like glazed donuts and icing, before their phone alarm suddenly chirped and they snapped apart.

Peridot spun around, looking for their phone. They heaved a sigh, silencing it and kept their back turned, their entire body on fire. The makeup was probably melting off their face.

"Sorry!" they slapped a hand over their mouth, self conscious that it had raised a pitch.

"Gotta go?"

"Y-yeah," they stammered, picking themselves back up, holding their phone close to their chest, heart pounding.

"See you later?" Amethyst's voice sounded hopeful.

Peridot nodded, still unable to face her. "There will be a break for lunch. We could try your 'Aqua Mexican' place."

"Sure! Yeah. Hey, what's your number? I can't believe we've been talking all this time and I don't have it."

Peridot recited their number. It didn't require a lot of thought. Their voice was deceptively calm, even robotic.

They jumped a little when their phone buzzed against their chest.

[Heeeey!] Amethyst's favorite winkie face emoticon was included in the message.

Peridot muttered that they were going to be late, still clutching the phone to their chest as they walked out of the room together.

"So. I'll text you when they let out for lunch." Peridot said looking at the floor. They couldn't look her in the eyes again. Not after Amethyst had touched them, not after that fantasy had sliced through their composure like a knife.

Not since they had been so close.

They parted ways and Amethyst shouted down the hall, "It's a date!"

Peridot would have stopped in their tracks if they weren't running late already.


	12. Chapter 12

About halfway through the day, Peridot's hair was unruly again. The building the conference took place in was cold, the air conditioning on blast. It wasn't humid at all, but their hair retaliated anyway.

They were in the restroom playing with it, wondering what Amethyst was doing, when a tall woman walked out of the stall and washed her hands beside them, talking to a friend.

Peridot almost ignored the conversation as they often did but the woman's voice was uncannily familiar. They found themselves taking quick, curious glances towards her, attempting to discern who exactly she was, if she was anyone Peridot knew.

She was tall. Long legs balanced on a pair of white pumps. She was wearing a pink pantsuit with pale yellow pinstripes. She was powdering her pale skin paler, chattering away with a woman dressed similarly, though the other woman was not quite as tall. Both women were talking about work matters: the presentation the taller woman was about to give, and did she want to go to lunch later?

Peridot did not recognize her, save for the voice. Then she chuckled, rolling her eyes and gesturing animatedly with her fingers and that caused Peridot to pause completely, thinking: it couldn't be!

This woman with wrinkles in the corners of bright blue eyes, with a 'I need to speak to a manager' soccer-mom haircut. This woman, who had to be twice their age and obviously carried a high position within the company.

This woman sounded like Amethyst's roommate, like…

"Thorn…?"

The very same woman who played competitive games with them as of a few months.

The woman responded, blinking, looking to Peridot, bewildered. Her mouth opened to ask something, likely how Peridot knew her, but the woman by her side intercepted, jovially taking her by the arm and leading her away.

"You're going to be late for your presentation, Pearl!"

"…Right."

She did turn in Peridot's direction again, before she was completely led out of sight.

X

It was disorienting to listen to Thorn's– Pearl's– voice give a work presentation. Peridot related that voice to in-game battle tactics, accompanied by Bismuth's boisterous tone flecked with camaraderie.

While she spoke, her voice was passionate, though less harried than it was in-game, and she was talking about company policy and end of the year goals rather than yelling for someone to take out a sniper.

Peridot was still trying to accept this other side of the woman. She wasn't as young as Peridot had imagined her, even though they knew she was their senior. It wasn't that she looked old; it was how she carried herself so confidently with all her years.

She was past fifty, they knew that. Amethyst had told them. She didn't look it but she certainly sounded it. Peridot wondered how a soccer mom type like Pearl had developed an interest in gaming.

When Pearl finished her presentation, it was time for lunch and Peridot realized they had spent the entire hour trying to figure Pearl out than listening to her speech.

It probably wasn't anything important.

They hefted their bookbag over their shoulder and left the conference room, texting one-handed.

[I'm free.]

[Where r u?]

Peridot glanced at the plaque labeling the room they had just walked out of and texted a reply. Amethyst was there in ten minutes. Peridot asked what she had been up to and hoped they hadn't made her wait long.

"No big deal. I just hung out and caught some Pokemon."

"Catch anything good?"

"There was a Dratini in the fountain courtyard."

"Nice."

They made a detour to the fountain courtyard, hoping the Dratini spawn was still there for Peridot to catch for themself. It was. Pearl was there too.

"Amethyst?"

Pearl was surprised, turning completely from her friend, the same woman Peridot had seen her chatting with in the restroom.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was about to ask you the same thing," Amethyst replied, not answering. She looked Pearl up and down and her eyes widened, apparently recognizing Pearl's work dress. "Dude. You two work for the same place?!"

Pearl found Peridot from the corner of her eye. "Oh, yes, it appears we do… Who is your friend, Amethyst?"

"Peridot." They extended their hand and Pearl caught it, shaking it twice.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Pearl and this is Jan. We were just about to go to lunch. Would you like to join us?"

"Only if you're all going to Aqua Mexican."

Pearl pulled a face. "Didn't you eat there yesterday?"

"Peri has to try the local eats."

"Well, if I didn't have to do another presentation, I would go. Try not to eat too many beans, Peridot." She winked, waving over her shoulder as she left, her briefcase swinging against her hip.

Peridot tried to take Pearl's advice but Amethyst was pushy, explaining that there wasn't any point ordering Mexican food if you weren't going to order extra black beans, extra refried beans, and some chili on top of the Mega Nachos.

"If you're gonna do it, do it right."

And she was right– it was not only the heftiest plate of nachos Peridot had eaten, but also the best. They were sorry that they couldn't finish it all and wondered how Amethyst was able to eat her plate plus half of Peridot's.

Over the meal, Peridot asked about Pearl.

"How did an old fogey like her get into competitive gaming?"

"Aw, she's not that old." Still, Amethyst laughed. "Pearl has always been a nerd, working on computers and junk. She only started playing games when she met Rose, least that's what Garnet told me."

"She's not what I expected."

"What did you expect?"

"I don't know," Peridot admitted. Someone cooler, that was for sure. Not someone who looked like she could be their boss or mother.

They didn't have much time together after finishing their food, but they spent the last ten minutes of Peridot's lunch in the courtyard near the fountain and sat on a wooden bench, talking.

"We wrap up in two hours," Peridot said.

"That's cool, I'll be around."

They frowned. They felt bad for making Amethyst loiter around and wait, but she insisted it was fine and more interesting than staying at home and loafing around. How wandering a conference center and its adjoining hotel could be interesting, Peridot was skeptical, but Amethyst waved her phone as if reading their thoughts.

During the rest of the two hours Peridot imagined that Amethyst was trekking the hallways and the streets nearby, looking for Pokemon. Or maybe she was in the hotel lobby watching a movie.

Peridot did not consider the possibility that Amethyst was waiting for them in their hotel room, forgetting they had given her the spare room key.

"Oh," Peridot gasped, surprised, the color coming back to their face. Amethyst hadn't answered their texts and they thought she had ditched them after all. But she hadn't. She had fallen asleep on Peridot's bed.

She rolled over. "Hey, come lay down with me." It was so casual, as if they hadn't just met this morning.

Peridot stepped closer, and when their knees knocked against the edge of the mattress, Amethyst pulled them by the front of their shirt into the tangle of covers.

No sooner had Amethyst pulled them in, she had fallen back asleep. Peridot struggled to relax, conscious of the closeness, but they were jetlagged and Amethyst was warm. In time they settled down, resting their chin on her shoulder. Amethyst's snore whistled against their ear.

They slept a little. It was a deep sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

Peridot felt the bed shift in their sleep from someone stirring next to them. At first they thought, Lapis. But then they opened their eyes and their heart leapt in their mouth, seeing Amethyst instead.

Amethyst was openly watching them. She moved a little closer. That alone pulled Peridot completely out of the embrace of sleep and into Amethyst's arms. The action was natural and Amethyst was not just allowing the intimacy, she was instigating it with an arm wrapped around their back. Her arm had been there when they woke up, but Amethyst hadn't moved it and Peridot didn't want her to.

Amethyst was oddly quiet. Peridot could feel the silence between them, thick but not uncomfortable. They could feel something shift in the air between them. The body language, the touch, the closeness of their bodies under the covers, seemed to convey the things Peridot wanted. They stiffened at that thought, reminding themselves that they had put Lapis through enough grief for misinterpreting her affection.

Amethyst was probably like Lapis: touchy-feely. That was okay. Peridot was the same way.

And then, just as Peridot had accustomed themselves to this being nothing more than platonic, Amethyst leaned in close. She might have kissed Peridot if they hadn't moved away suddenly.

"No, then?"

"What were you going to do?!" Peridot asked, disbelieving.

"Kiss you. Is that alright?"

"But aren't you straight?" They narrowed their eyes, skeptical.

Amethyst lazily shrugged. "Maybe a little bi-curious."

"Your online dating profile states otherwise."

She scoffed. "That old thing? I haven't touched it in years. Lot's changed."

Peridot swallowed. Without thinking they shimmied closer to her. "So let me get this straight: you just want to experiment?"

"The first time you sleep with anyone is an experiment."

Now that she said it, so plainly, Peridot colored, scratching their upper lip and turning away, bashful.

"And I like you, you dork," Amethyst added. "I don't just do it with anyone…" And then, quietly, she continued, "…Is that what you think of me?"

"No!" All of their shyness was gone. "I just didn't think you'd want to do anything. Your statement was surprising– that's all."

That was not all. There was still some hesitation. Amethyst's mere curiosity could hurt them eventually.

Peridot looked at her and grappled with common sense and longing. 'Why do you like me?' they wanted to ask. Did Amethyst resent them, thinking they thought she'd sleep with anyone?

They started from the beginning and answered Amethyst's first inquiry. Kissing. Was that okay?

"Yes, I do want to kiss." They took off their glasses, smudged after falling asleep with them on.

"C'mere." Again, like that morning before Peridot had to leave for the conference, she cupped the back of their head. Peridot closed their eyes before Amethyst's lips touched theirs. Her breath ghosted over their lips. She was warm. So so warm and soft, like everything that Peridot had imagined except that her mouth was sweet. Considering all the things Peridot had watched the woman shove in her mouth, the taste of fennel was unexpected, but welcome.

Amethyst breathed sharply and as if Peridot wasn't close enough, drew them closer.

The covers over them suddenly felt too hot.

Distantly, Peridot wondered if they were moving too fast. Quickly, they reasoned that within a short weekend, they and Amethyst didn't have the luxury to take things slow. This small window was one of the only chances they would have together.

And they knew each other; they had talked to each other for months. They were not strangers.

Tonight they would finally know each other in the physical sense. No screens, no distance between them. Maybe that was why they gripped each other so tight and kissed so hard, so greedily. There had been too much distance before.

And now they meant to obliterate that completely.

Amethyst took Peridot's hand and led it up her shirt. Peridot squeezed her breast. Amethyst grinned, slyly, keeping their hand there.

"You're so soft," they whispered, shuddering and gleeful.

"Thanks." Warm breath blanketed their ear, and then she kissed their hairline and nibbled their ear.

Kissing Peridot had done before. The rest were things they had only read in fanfiction and seen in movies. The rest had been things they could only imagine and had often wondered if they would ever experience. What would it feel like for someone to kiss their neck? For teeth to graze their collar bone? How would it feel to hear someone say they wanted them? For those words to shoot through their body like white hot heat, spreading from their abdomen and warming their sex?

Now they knew. And they wanted more.

Peridot didn't try to undo the clasp of Amethyst's bra. They hiked it up along with her loose flannel shirt.

"You got a good look yet?" Amethyst asked, not impatiently. There was a lilt to her voice that suggested that she was joking. Still, Peridot found they couldn't move, reminded sharply that Amethyst was older, more experienced than them. The thought was intrusive, shattering the bolt of confidence. The high of their enthusiasm ebbed, not replaced but accompanied now with dread.

They had an idea of what to do next, but they had no experience, no practice.

Amethyst would know with the bundle of experience under her belt; she'd figure out Peridot didn't know what they were doing.

"You all right?"

Peridot managed a nod, swallowing. "Just nervous."

"What's there to be nervous about?"

Everything, Peridot thought. Everything.

Like before, Amethyst took their hand. This time she was topless and Peridot watched their hand cup one large breast, a pert nipple peeking out between their middle and forefinger. Her breasts were heavy and sagged under their own weight, almost reaching her pierced navel.

Still Peridot could not move, not even manage a squeeze, transfixed and still nervous, biting their bottom lip.

Amethyst made another move. Her hands gently tapped Peridot's chest just underneath the collarbone, tipping them over to fall back first into the bed. And then she shuffled forwards on her knees and straddled them, a bit of mischief shining in her dark brown eyes.

It felt natural for Amethyst to pin them down with her weight. Tentatively, they squeezed her breast. Amethyst made a noise so soft that Peridot almost missed it. She leaned back and grinded against Peridot's thigh. Her knee pressed into their crotch and shifted with her movements.

"Fuck," she hissed.

And then her phone rang.

"Fuck…" she said again. "Just ignore it."

They tried to continue, but the caller was persistent. Reluctantly, Amethyst pulled away to search for her phone, cursing violently under her breath.

Finally, she found it. She had meant to put her phone on vibrate but when she picked it up, the bright screen illuminated the surprise on her face.

"Fuck. I have to take this. One sec." She treaded back to the bathroom to pace or for privacy. Peridot heard smatterings of the conversation:

"–Tonight?"

"–What about the babysitter…? Oh! That bitch! Yeah, yeah, alright. I'm on my way. I'll be a bit though– Oh hey! Can I bring a friend?"

'Friend.'

Peridot wondered if Amethyst straddled all of her friends half-naked or if Peridot was a lucky exception. They had let loose, ignoring the minor details to have fun, but now that the moment had passed, there was room to doubt again.

"Hey, I gotta go home and watch Ste-man. You want to come over?" Amethyst had hung up and was putting her clothes back on. "We can order pizza or something."

"Sure." Peridot still wasn't sure what Amethyst was looking for and if that would coincide with their interests. Still…

"You should bring something comfy."

"Why?"

"For if you want to spend the night."

Still, they'd follow her anywhere.


	14. Chapter 14

"That's 'Li'l Stevie?'" Peridot asked flatly, scrutinizing the toddler in Amethyst's arms.

"Yeah, who'd you think I was always talking about?"

Steven laughed in Amethyst's arms, and reached out towards Peridot. Peridot made a pointed step back, frowning.

"I don't know… the cat?"

"Oooh! That's Lion," Amethyst explained, smirking.

"And who was that at the door?" It had not been Pearl that met them at the house and left Steven in Amethyst's arms.

"That was Garnet. She's pretty cool."

The other woman had terrified Peridot. She was tall, taller than Pearl, and exuded a confidence they had never seen before. She was quiet and had barely spoken to Peridot except to say, "Howdy."

Before she had left, she had stopped at the door, turned her head and slowly given Peridot a thumbs up.

"A roommate?"

"Yeah."

It was the first time Peridot had met– or heard of– her. Amethyst often talked about Pearl, probably because they were almost always butting heads. Garnet seemed like the type to keep mostly to herself.

"I'll order pizza if you'll set up Netflix." Amethyst balanced Steven against her hip and with her free hand dug her phone out of her pants pocket.

Peridot left the kitchen, moving into the living room. Unlike Amethyst's room, the rest of the house was tidy, the perfect model of a suburban homestead.

There was a display fireplace underneath the television, and from the corner of their eye, Peridot spotted a playroom, the floor furnished with soft blue foam. There was a toy chest, a reading nook, and scattered crayons. Peridot guessed that Steven was colouring with Garnet before they had arrived.

Peridot wondered what Amethyst was going to do with Steven. They had noticed the sun had gone down while they were on the bus to Amethyst's– maybe she would tuck Steven in.

"The pizza should be here in fifteen minutes." As Amethyst entered the room, Steven toddled past her, zooming in on Peridot. His little feet were fast, but he wasn't used to braking and crashed into Peridot.

"Ow," he said, though from his tone it was more of a reaction than anything to be taken seriously.

"Guh!" Peridot yelped, stiffening.

"You okay, Ste-man?" Amethyst helped him up and he gurgled something, spittle shining on his lips.

"Is he going to watch Li'l Butler with us?" Peridot regained their bearings too, holding onto the remote as if expecting him to grab it.

"Yeah, why not?"

"Don't you think…" Peridot pushed their glasses up the bridge of their nose, pausing. "…That it's a little inappropriate for a child to watch?"

"It's just a sitcom. 'Sides, he's not going to know what's going on anyways or remember it. Fuck if I know what I was doing before kindergarten."

Peridot argued that they had crisp memories of when they were Steven's age, but Amethyst had only shrugged at that and sat on the couch, Steven planted firmly in her lap. So the toddler was there to stay, Peridot thought, sitting next to Amethyst but allowing some distance between them.

Midway through an episode, Amethyst rectified this by wrapping an arm around Peridot. As if imitating her, Steven batted at Peridot's thigh and tugged on their shirt.

Peridot narrowed their eyes at him to stop.

"Aww, he likes you!"

"Isn't it past his bedtime?"

"When Auntie Amethyst babysits, there is no bedtime, Isn't that right, Ste-man?" She lifted him up as she said this, and then her face turned as if she regretted the action.

"Oh, geez. Time to unwrap this 'present.' Be right back."

Peridot paused the episode, freeze-framing one of the characters into an awkward facial expression that could be a sneeze or developing disgust. They drummed their fingers on the couch, taking in the twisting turn of the evening. Just hours ago, Amethyst had been half-naked and grinding against them, gasping, cursing, hands grabbing, wrinkling the bottom of Peridot's button-up shirt.

How could that have been hours ago when the current mood was so far removed from that moment?

Peridot found it troubling to remember all this in the current context, seeing Amethyst hold Steven and mess with his hair.

And Steven: Peridot hadn't been expecting a kid. The kid was moderately well-behaved and had yet to cry or scream, but Peridot fully expected it to happen any moment.

Steven was the first to come back, running ahead of Amethyst, straight to Peridot. Amethyst followed, setting up a child safety gate behind her to bar entry to the kitchen. She also strode across the room to set up another gate, securing another hallway. Then, just as she was about to take a seat next to Peridot, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get that." Peridot stood up. More than fifteen minutes had passed; it was likely the pizza delivery person.

Amethyst took them by the shoulder and pushed them back in their seat. "No. Let me."

Peridot yielded to that and reached for their card instead. Amethyst leaned forward, leaving a damp kiss on their cheek, stalling them.

"Nope. My treat."

X

Over pizza, Peridot scarcely paid attention to the holiday special of Li'l Butler on the TV. They couldn't help but be distracted by Steven who waddled back and forth across the room, picking up toys and setting them next to Peridot.

"What is he doing?" Peridot finally asked after Steven forced a plastic donut into their hands.

"I told you he likes you, Peri! He's showing you some Steven style hospitality."

"Must he insist?" Peridot asked, a little exasperated. "What am I supposed to do with this?" They motioned to the plastic donut and the array of toys he had littered specifically around them.

"Just say thank you."

Peridot looked at the donut thoughtfully. "Wow. Thanks. I guess?"

Steven smiled. He had yet to grow his two front teeth. Peridot couldn't help but snort, which only encouraged Steven to smiler wider and then laugh along with them.

"You little clod. You don't even know what I'm laughing about."

"He doesn't have to." Amethyst ruffled his hair, thick curls falling in all directions. "He's a baby. It's what they do."

"Toddler," Peridot corrected.

"Eh, same diff."

For the next half hour Peridot humored the toddler's game of gifting random objects, episode after episode of Li'l Butler playing in the background. The pizza got cold but they continued to munch on it.

By force of habit Peridot's hand wandered, searching for half-eaten pieces. When they found none and found themselves baffled by this, they turned to Amethyst, who was finishing off a slice of pizza.

"You eat the crust?"

"Yeah." Amethyst swallowed. "Don't you?"

"I do– it's Lazuli that doesn't."

"Your roommate?"

Peridot confirmed this and left it at that. Steven gave them a block. Amethyst followed their gaze, a sort of tired half-smile crossing her features.

"I was hoping he would fall asleep eventually, but I don't think that's going to happen. He always does this! It's like he knows or something."

"Does what?" Peridot asked quizzically, accepting a doll from the boy.

Amethyst gently plucked the toy from Peridot's hands and placed her own hands there instead.

"I wanted to pick up where we left off, with no interruptions."

"Oh," Peridot answered lamely, voice weak.

"I don't mind this though." Her thumb followed the curve of Peridot's hand. She reached behind her for the remote and lowered the volume of the television.

Since they couldn't have sex tonight, Amethyst decided they would ask each other racey questions. Peridot doubted that was ethical with Steven running about the room, but like before Amethyst waved it off, certain he wouldn't remember or understand.

"So, how many people have you done it with?"

Peridot's voice caught in their throat. Cautiously they replied, "…No one…"

"Whoa! Are you serious?! You're a virgin?"

Peridot nodded, chewing. They couldn't taste the pizza in their mouth. Finally, they admitted, "I'm kind of glad we got interrupted. I'm probably bad at it."

"What? Sex?"

They nodded again.

"You can't know that. Not until you try," Amethyst argued, intercepting the last piece of pizza. "What makes you think that?"

Peridot shrugged. "I don't know."

"Why do you really think that?" she pressed.

Peridot sighed and looked away. "Because when I tried to take things seriously with Lazuli… she dumped me."

"The roommate? The one who doesn't eat pizza crusts?"

A grave nod.

"Yeesh. No wonder. Look, you can't let people make you feel… make you feel– like you can't do anything! So that was one girlfriend. Big whoop."

"I don't want you to hate me."

"Psh. Well, I'm pretty inexperienced too."

Peridot laughed. "You?! Now you're REALLY reaching, Amethyst."

She placed her hand over theirs. "No, really. I've never been with another gir– I mean." She licked her lips, searching for the words. "I've only been with dudes, Peri. Like, guys who were born guys and still feel like guys."

"There's a word for that."

"You can tell me later. The point is: if we did it, I would know just as much as you do."

Peridot turned that statement over in their head. They wondered if it mattered.

"You say that like we'll meet again."

"I want to."

"So do I."

X

The clock ticked on. Steven was still awake and Garnet was still out as well as Pearl. When Peridot asked how they would get back to the conference center in the morning, Amethyst said she would ask if Pearl could give them a lift, pulling out her phone.

They both stayed up in hopes that Steven would fall asleep, giving them free reign of the bedroom and some time alone, but it was like Amethyst had said: it was like he knew what they were both up to.

With the final season of Li'l Butler finished, there was nothing else to do but to watch the show from the beginning. Peridot yawned, aware that staying up any longer was a bad idea, but they wanted the most of their time with Amethyst.

Still, Peridot expected to be the first to fall asleep. Amethyst had shown to have more resilience than them in that department, but she had unexpectedly been the one to nod off first, arms wrapped around Peridot's arm and resting her cheek against their shoulder. She had grown too comfortable and fallen asleep. Peridot knew that's what happened because they could feel themselves giving in too, tempted by the comfort and warmth of her.

Steven was in their lap, eyes wide, resistant to the temptations of sleep. Persistent little clod, Peridot thought for a moment, smiling. Then they looked up, alarmed and sharply nudged Amethyst.

"Amethyst… Amethyst!" they hissed. If she fell asleep and they fell asleep there would be no one to watch over Steven.

"Amethyst…!" their voice, although raised was weak, and it was very late. Their last thought before they nodded off was that they had no idea how to take care of a child, even if they could have overcame this and stayed awake.


	15. Chapter 15

The hustle and bustle of the house woke Peridot early that morning, not Amethyst or Steven.

There was a weight in Peridot's arms- Steven- and the television screen was black except for white text that asked if they were still watching Li'l Butler.

Just as they were absorbing that they had fallen asleep while trying to wake Amethyst up, the television was turned off and they found Pearl beside them, the remote in her hand.

"Good morning." There was a knowing smile spread across her lips.

This was possibly one of the least professional positions Pearl could have found them in, passed out on the floor, Amethyst drooling against their forearm and Steven gurgling in his sleep in their lap.

But Pearl's smile changed to a warm one as she bent to pick up Steven. However, her voice was as clipped and straight as ever. "Be ready in five minutes."

Peridot snapped to attention, not questioning her. Amethyst collapsed on the floor without Peridot there to prop them up, but she seemed okay, rolling over and snoring loudly.

"Sorry," Peridot whispered, and when they were sure she was fine, they ran to the restroom to do their business and splash water on their face.

They were wearing the same clothes they wore yesterday, and doubting they had the time to change, resigned themselves to wear the checkered slacks and wrinkled white button-up again. They adjusted their bowtie, disheveled after Amethyst had tugged at it in the hotel room. That had been several hours ago- yesterday.

They had fallen asleep wearing the makeup Amethyst had applied and could see themselves paying for it already: two zits had emerged prominently on their chin and it looked like another was developing on the tip of their nose. Their hair was as hopeless as ever. The rest could be straightened out, and when Pearl called for them from the door they had done the best they could.

Pearl handed them a bagel but nothing to drink. Peridot looked at the time and wondered if they would be asking too much to stop for a cup of coffee. Pearl must have read the disappointment on their face. She said there was going to be coffee and snacks waiting for them at the conference.

Sitting at the kitchen table, reading the news on her phone with half a bowl of cereal in front of her, was Garnet. She looked like she had just come out from a workout, wearing loose fitting clothes and a sweatband. And, oddly enough, sunglasses indoors.

"Long night?" Garnet asked. At first Peridot thought she was talking to them, but Pearl answered.

"I had a few drinks." Pearl winked. She didn't look like she had done any drinking or had stayed up at all. She looked as fresh as a daisy, dressed primly in a baby blue pantsuit with pastel yellow stripes.

Pearl looked at the time and they said their goodbyes to Garnet and to Amethyst, who was still passed out where Peridot had reluctantly left her. As they left Garnet gave a thumbs up, and Peridot knew it was directed towards them. Unnerved, they scrambled out the door after Pearl.

X

In the minivan, on the way to the conference with Pearl at the wheel, Peridot texted Amethyst.

[Good morning.]

They wrote a following message, apologizing for letting her fall to the floor and for leaving suddenly- then deleted all they wrote without sending it, pocketing their phone.

They did not notice Pearl had been watching them from the corner of her eye.

"So, Peridot... how did you and Amethyst meet?" Pearl had tried to sound conversational, but something in her voice gave away that she was prying.

"Oh you know. Online," Peridot answered vaguely, recalling that Amethyst had asked them not to tell Pearl how they had met or how she spent her time online camming.

"I know. But where?" Pearl pressed, both hands on the wheel, with a gaze that occasionally veered in Peridot's direction.

"Cha...Chat roulette!" they quickly lied.

"Oh, that's good. I was a little worried that you met through other means."

"Nope! Not us!" Peridot laughed, a cold sweat breaking out on the back of their neck. They laughed again and wondered if they should laugh more, if that would make them sound less conspicuous.

"Amethyst's sister is very protective you know," Pearl mentioned, and like Peridot was a terrible liar, Pearl was a bad actor. Her casual tone quickly became conspiratorial. "As am I. This isn't the first time Amethyst has dated someone she met online."

Now Peridot was curious. "Who?"

"Does it matter?" Pearl set the car in park and her eyes settled on Peridot as she unfastened her seatbelt and scooped up her briefcase and water bottle.

"What happened to him?"

Again, Pearl smiled, not quite cold, but not warm either, detached and controlling. "Does it matter? In any case, in spite of the means in which you met, I do quite prefer you to that Mike character she was seeing. But I expect you won't pull what he did... Garnet and Steven seem to trust you."

Peridot raised a brow. "Are you threatening me?"

"I'm giving you a warning."

When they'd woken up this morning, Peridot had been afraid they had been the one to give off an unprofessional vibe. Now they were sure that whatever position Pearl had found them in, it was better than the one she was exhibiting now. "You're like my boss, you know. You can't just say stuff like this."

"Amethyst is like a sister to me. And if you had watched her go through what the last person put her through, you would be worried too. I am serious about the camgirl nonsense however."

Peridot sucked in a breath, their hands in tight fists around the the strap of their backpack. Boldly, they replied, "Amethyst is an adult, Pearl. She's older than me! She can make her own decisions- good or bad. That's how we figure out how to fix our problems in IT. We can't make it perfect unless we make mistakes first and figure out how to tweak it. Whatever that Mike guy did to Amethyst… she's smart enough to have figured out how to avoid it again."

Peridot paused to catch their breath and scrambled out of the car, wrestling with the seatbelt.

"So maybe mind your own business... You old clod!" They slammed the car door and hefted the backpack over their shoulder, taking quick strides past Pearl.

"Oh. And thanks for the ride," they grumbled as an afterthought.

And ever polite, Pearl couldn't help but reply, although tersely, "You're welcome."

X

After the general introductions from the CEO of the company, Pearl was the first to give her presentation. Her voice was thick and fractured. She was clearly irritated but determined to carry on.

Peridot tuned out as Pearl spoke. They were agitated after the conversation in the parking lot. It was unprofessional and petty, and they probably missed out on vital information by ignoring her, but they could hardly stand hearing her speak, let alone absorb what she was saying.

It was, however, a short presentation, and Pearl was probably as grateful as Peridot was for that.

To take their mind off things during the following presentations, they doodled in the margins of their notes and paid closer attention than usual. During bathroom breaks they ducked outside for a decent signal and texted Amethyst.

[How much free time do u have after this?] she had asked an hour ago.

[Not much. I have to get on the plane after we wrap up.]

[no]

[I'm sorry.]

[don't be.]

Peridot was about to reply back when Pearl stepped quietly in front of them, her hands folded in her lap.

"What do you want?"

Pearl cleared her throat and shifted her stance. From the few times Peridot had met her face to face, this was the first where Pearl did not present as elegant. She was uncomfortable, not her usual, poised self. Her arms and legs were suddenly too gangly for her.

"I came to apologize."

"Really?" Peridot stepped back and looked her up and down, as if this could only be an imposter.

"Yes." Pearl rubbed her arm, looking away. "I may have taken things too far this morning."

"You think?"

"It's difficult to let go after you've looked after someone."

Peridot scrunched up their nose. "What are you saying? Isn't Amethyst just your roommate?"

Pearl motioned to the bench next to the fountain, where just yesterday Peridot had caught a Dratini.

They sat. They talked. Pearl asked them to not to tell Amethyst about what she was about to share.

"I don't think she wants you to know."

"Know what?"

"That she's an orphan."

Somehow that came as no surprise to Peridot. Amethyst loved attention. She had told Peridot before that the attention was the continuing appeal of camming. But, the rest came as a slight surprise. Amethyst's sister was in jail for drug possession, which was why Amethyst had been taken into Rose's care when she was just a middle schooler.

"To be honest, the camgirl work doesn't bother me. But it bothers Jasper. You see, their mother wasn't always there, so Jasper felt obligated to take care of the house and Amethyst. It's tough being a full-time student and trying to live. To make money, she..."

Pearl hesitated, and her voice, already low, turned down another notch.

"She acquired money through illegal means. Using her body."

Pearl's outburst that morning suddenly made sense.

"She doesn't want Amethyst to end up like her," Peridot said, putting the pieces together.

"Exactly."

"But camming isn't like prostitution. And what Amethyst is doing isn't illegal."

"It's the same to Jasper."

They sat quietly after that, the fountain bubbling behind them, misting their backs with a cool spray of water, the remaining five minutes of the break ticking away.

"Why did you tell me all this?"

"Because in spite of the impression I left this morning, I do trust you."

"Because Garnet and Steven trust me?"

Pearl shook her head, smirking. "Someone who can get Amethyst to clean up her room before they come over can't be too bad. And you're right: Amethyst does learn from her mistakes."

Peridot knit their brows in disbelief. "Amethyst cleaned her room. For me?!"

They would never have known it because Amethyst had purposely led them away from her room, insisting they watch Li'l Butler in the living room instead. Peridot had assumed it was safer and easier to watch Steven that way. Now they imagined that Amethyst had felt the room, though cleaner than usual, wasn't clean enough to reveal to Peridot.

"Yes," Pearl confirmed. "She tried to hide it from me, but at the last minute she asked for my help." She chortled, then glanced at her watch.

She stood up then and extended her hand. Peridot caught it and they shook hands.

"It was nice to put a face to the name, 'PercyxPierre4ever.'"

"The feeling is mutual, Thorn."

Their eyes locked and they struggled to hold a straight face, falling into a fit of chuckles.

Pearl left them after that, anxious about being late, but Peridot hung back to check their text messages. Some time during their conversation with Pearl, their phone had buzzed in their pants pocket.

[I wanna see u. How much longer?]

[One more hour. I want to see you too.]

Amethyst replied back soon after. She said she would be waiting in Peridot's hotel room.

Peridot couldn't wait. The sooner the conference ended, the sooner they could run up to their room into Amethyst's arms.

But, in a sense, Peridot could wait, because they knew that when they were free do this, they would have to get ready to leave.

And two hours was not enough. Not even a full weekend would have been.


	16. Chapter 16

Peridot did not waste time texting Amethyst that they were on their way. Every second counted. They clenched a fist around the strap of their backpack as the conference slowly drew to a close, waiting for the go-ahead to leave. They might have been the first person to spring from their seat. They were not paying attention.

They walk-jogged at a brisk pace, tripping more than occasionally, to reach their hotel room. When they were at the door, they fumbled with their room key and dropped their bag. The room key dropped out of their hand, of course, and they reached for it, shaking.

Amethyst beat them to it, opening the door.

"Hah. I thought that was you–"

Peridot pounced on her and the door swung behind them, book bag and everything else forgotten.

"Geez." Amethyst finally managed to break away.

"Shut up. I've wanted to do that all morning!"

"Just all morning?" she teased.

"…Since last night."

Amethyst's fingers curled around tufts of blonde hair. "Good. Me too."

Pulling Peridot forward, she kissed them with the same frantic passion. The reciprocation surprised Peridot still. No one had ever kissed them hard and sloppily, tugging at their hair and showing teeth.

Amethyst nipped at them. Peridot nipped back and sucked her bottom lip.

"Mmm, you're a lot less shy this time."

"We are on a set schedule, Amethyst!" Peridot hissed.

Amethyst snorted. "Really?"

"Yes, really! I have to get cleaned up and then pack and go to the airport. We have less than two hours."

"We could take a shower together."

Stiffening at that suggestion, Peridot looked away. "I… not that that doesn't sound appealing."

They tugged on their shirt self-consciously. Along with the make-up Amethyst had applied, they'd also fallen asleep with their binder on, and while taking it off sounded like a relief, they weren't ready to do so in front of Amethyst.

"You being shy again?"

Peridot frowned. "No." They paused. With Lapis, when they were intimate together, Peridot didn't need to mention this. Lapis already knew. Amethyst didn't and they wondered with the other woman's tendency to lounge around her room naked if she would think Peridot was a prude. They were not. That wasn't it…

"I like to wear clothes."

Amethyst was quiet, and then, "Is it a part of that nonbinary thing?"

"Maybe. I'm not sure. I just feel more comfortable with clothes on. Is that ok?"

Amethyst dragged a hand through their hair and nuzzled them, kissing the slope where shoulder meets neck. "Long as you keep kissing me."

"Can do."

"C'mere… "

X

The kissing had escalated to both hands exploring underneath Amethyst's shirt and ducking their head under the fabric to kiss her breasts.

"You're– you're really good at this."

The praise had encouraged them to continue, to forget packing, a shower, and their flight. They allowed themselves to be irresponsible for ten minutes only to realize nearly forty minutes had passed when Amethyst said reluctantly, "When's your flight again?"

"Shit!" Peridot had jumped, still trapped under the shirt.

The shower was postponed until they got back home. Thankfully, there wasn't much to pack up and Peridot didn't care if they left behind a few items as long, as they got their allergy medication and laptop.

Amethyst watched Peridot scuttle back and forth in a frenzy, thoroughly bemused by their frantic packing. She was as helpful as a cat, lording over the proceedings, and to escalate the tension, she shimmied partway out of her pants and pulled her panties to the side, stroking herself vigorously.

Catching a glimpse of this, Peridot forgot where they were and knocked their forehead against the wall.

"I'm okay! Please! Continue!"

"You sure?"

"Yes!"

She continued, the scent of her arousal permeating through the hotel room like thick perfume. It was near impossible to finish packing, smelling her, listening to the soft wet noises of her fingers rubbing against her clit and her ragged breath. The sounds were familiar but the smell of her sex was new and elicited a longing they didn't know they had until now.

"Hurry up and I'll let you have a taste," Amethyst purred, as if reading their mind.

Peridot threw a few more things in their suitcase and zipped it shut with such a speed that later they wouldn't remember packing at all.

"I'm done!" they announced, approaching Amethyst for the reward.

"You sure? You got everything?"

Peridot eagerly nodded. They kneeled at the foot of the bed, Amethyst peering over them, her shirt still drawn half up, breasts spilling out and pants hung around her ankles. The inner and outer lips of her labia peeked out from behind the panties, glistening with a distinct wetness.

In that position, Peridot could tilt their head up and drag their tongue bottom to top and linger there, sucking on the ripe, fat clit peering from the sheath of flesh. But they didn't. There was something unspoken, that this was something worth waiting for, that they required Amethyst's permission.

Peridot watched Amethyst dip her fingers inside of herself. "You're going to make yourself late," she taunted, barring entry, her foot pressed against Peridot's chest. "If you lick me I'm not going to be able to let you go."

"I want to taste you," Peridot pleaded.

Amethyst leaned forward, hair falling over her breasts and her lap, blocking the beautiful view of her sex. She offered two fingers and Peridot opened their mouth without protest, accepting what they were given. They were greedy; they wanted to complain and call Amethyst stingy and demand her cunt, but then they tasted her and were grateful.

What was given could not be called meager. It was everything.

"Let me…" They had a hand on her thigh but Amethyst kept her legs closed.

"Next time," Amethyst promised.

X

The taste of her still lingered in Peridot's mouth, and more than once on the flight home, they found themselves licking their lips. After the plane landed, while waiting for Lapis, they visited a gift shop and bought chapstick.

The weekend had come and gone so fast that it was plausible that Peridot hadn't departed for their flight at all, that they had fallen asleep at the airport terminal and just woken from a very good dream.

But the date on their phone and on the newspapers showed that the weekend had truly passed and Peridot hadn't dreamed it. Amethyst was real, and so were their reciprocated feelings. She had hugged Peridot tight before they boarded the plane, and for a while the front of their shirt had been wet.

"Next time," they had promised each other, but how soon would there be a next time? However soon it was, it would not be soon enough.


	17. Chapter 17

"I was going to give you a hug but..."

Lapis covered her nose when she met Peridot at the sliding doors, the car parked a few paces away.

"I know," Peridot replied tersely, glad that it was Sunday. There had been the occasional conference in the past that shuttled them back in town on Monday, and then they'd had to go into the office for a few hours. Peridot didn't know what they would have done if they had come back Monday instead. The extra time with Amethyst would have been nice, but they couldn't afford going into the office without a shower.

Peridot wondered how Amethyst had been able to kiss them like this. She hadn't complained or shown any reaction to the smell. But then, Peridot wondered if Amethyst had bathed before coming up to their hotel room.

Maybe they both smelled but were too distracted by their own carnal needs- or most likely- their musk had catapulted them towards eroticism. Later, on voice chat, Amethyst said she remembered Peridot's smell the most.

"You smelled so good."

Peridot tested this, taking up one of their dirty shirts balled up in the laundry basket and took a whiff. They regretted this experiment.

X

It had been easy to adjust to Amethyst's physical presence. It was hard to acclimate back to interacting indirectly through the internet. Peridot could hear her, see her, but they couldn't smell her or feel her warmth. Still, without those two things Amethyst could still send a prickle of heat down Peridot's abdomen, soaking their boxer briefs.

"Not complaining, but what happened to thinking you'd be too bad at it to even try?" Amethyst asked. She was referring to their last moment in the hotel room.

"We didn't have much time, and I wanted to." Peridot wished they had a more cognitive, detailed answer to that. But it was just that: they didn't know if they'd ever have that chance again. Amethyst had talked about meeting again, but Peridot had had their doubts. She didn't anymore, still speaking to Amethyst weeks after they had met in person.

"So if we didn't have to stop, what do you think would have happened?" Amethyst rolled on her side, ass facing the camera, the purple puma tramp stamp in full view.

Peridot swallowed, suddenly shy. "You know."

"Tell me anyway."

"All right." Peridot breathed in sharply and closed their eyes, clutching the side of their reddening face. "I would have… um buried my face in your cunt, your thighs would clamp down on both sides of my head, holding me there and you'd roll your hips up, using my mouth."

"Oh damn!" Amethyst shouted. "Where did that all come from?"

"I'm a natural." Peridot carefully omitted that they had been playing text based RP for years on the Camp Pining Hearts forums. They mostly posted in the 18+ boards.

They licked their lips as if they could taste her. "What would you do?"

"Hold your head down and never let go."

"I wouldn't want you to."

"Nice." She was touching herself.

Peridot continued, "I would suck your clit, drag my tongue over your slit over and over. Your juices would smear all over my face."

"I would buck my hips."

"Your movements would be sloppy."

"Would you touch yourself?" Amethyst asked, breathless.

"If you'd like me to."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Then yes, I would reach past the band of my boxers and stroke myself, all while still pleasuring you."

"You can do that?"

"Yes. I can multi-task."

"What else can you do?"

"I could do lots of things."

"Oh yeah?"

"I could use my fingers and spread you wide open, and gently pull back the flesh framing your clit, completely baring it to the open air, warming it with my breath, my tongue."

Amethyst was gasping, touching herself in exact accordance to Peridot's descriptions. "-And your fingers?"

"Inside you. Right after I tease your nice fat clit with a little pinch."

"Damn. Damn." Amethyst half moaned, half laughed. "No really, where did you learn to talk like this? I never thought you'd-"

"Amethyst, you want me to continue, correct?"

"Fuck yes, I do."

Peridot steeled themselves. They were becoming bolder with each dirty exchange but there were some areas they were still unsure to tread, enforcing authority, however light, was one of them.

"Quiet." She had been leading them off track and Peridot wasn't ready to admit that roleplaying the Percy and Pierre ship with friends had prepared them for this.

They were surprised Amethyst listened. Amethyst, who typically rolled her eyes at authority figures, halted her questions and waited for Peridot to continue. The bed sheets under her were sopping wet and Peridot wanted to lap every drop her cunt had to offer. They said so, and then continued.

"My fingers would slip inside you so easily. I wouldn't take my time going inside you one by one. I'd start with three because I know you can take it... and much more. Would you clench around me? Or accept me, completely open to me?"

"I'd greedily take whatever you gave me." Now one of her legs was in the air so she could reach between her legs and insert three fingers. "I start to clench up when I'm about to come. Scared a few guys when that happened."

She appeared proud of herself.

Peridot didn't much care for hearing about the guys Amethyst had played with in the past but moved on. Amethyst was with them now, pleasuring herself in accordance to Peridot's suggestions.

"Four fingers... then I would fold my thumb."

"You'd fist me?"

"Not yet." Peridot shook their head. "I would pleasure you orally again, and move in and out in a rocking motion."

"My hips would move to meet your thrusts."

"I would use my free hand to still your actions."

"I would buck harder. I'm stronger than you."

"Yes, you are," Peridot admitted. "But I could threaten to stop."

"But you don't want to."

"...True," Peridot conceded quietly.

"So you get your whole fist inside me and I ride you. And you give me the best head I've ever had."

Peridot flinched a little at Amethyst's choice of words, but let it pass.

Suddenly, Amethyst stopped touching herself, focusing on Peridot. "Hey, you too."

"Me too what?"

"You said you'd touch yourself earlier."

She was right. Peridot had almost forgotten, distracted by Amethyst's display. They were so used to merely observing.

Amethyst took their silence as discomfort. "Sorry. Is that going too far? I just thought since you mentioned it it was okay. You don't gotta."

Peridot shook their head and glanced up at the eye of their webcamera, currently broadcasting.

"Give me a minute. I'll switch to voice."

"Alright."

They adjusted the settings to the call so that they could still see Amethyst but she couldn't see them. Then they reached for the green plaid blanket hanging off their bed and draped it over their lap. After that, they had shimmied partially out of their boxers, the blanket still covering them from the waist down.

"I'm ready."

They were about to continue, but Amethyst interrupted. "You gonna still give my puss some kisses while you touch yourself? I wanna feel you moan against my slit."

"Of course." Peridot had thought they would clam up out of humiliation touching themselves with Amethyst on call but the opposite had occurred: they found themselves holding back noises. They had one hand between their legs, and one hand covering their mouth, nose peeking out between their fingers.

"I can hear you." Amethyst snickered.

"N-no, you don't."

"Come on, Peri. You gonna make some wheezy sexy nerd noises for me?"

"Maybe." They held back a moan. Amethyst caught it, smiling slyly. She spread her vulva lips, looking straight into the camera.

"You know, you could put more than fingers in this pussy," she suggested, the corners of her eyes crinkling with delight. "You could strap on a thick cock and fuck me. Wouldn't that be nice? Thrusting into me?"

"Yes," Peridot squeaked and tightened their hold over their mouth.

"I still hear you."

"NO YOU DON'T!"

"Mmmhmm." Amethyst hummed, briefly dipping her fingers into her cunt, making a show of it, licking the wetness off her fingertips. "I hear you loud and clear. Are you having fun imagining yourself fucking all of my holes?"

"Yes," they conceded, a moan finally slipping past.

"There we go. Now that's more like it."

"Amethyst..." They were having trouble focusing on her, on their surroundings.

"You gonna come for me?"

Peridot could only manage a nod. Red splotches spread from their chest up to their neck and cheeks. The blanket was suddenly too hot, but they kept it over their lap, sweltering from the heat and the rise of their orgasm.

Initially, they thought Amethyst's voyeurism and teasing would discourage an orgasm. Amethyst still teased. She still called Peridot a nerd and any nickname she could come up with, but contrary to Peridot's expectations, that only heightened their arousal. They didn't like to be embarrassed most of the time, but when Amethyst teased she was sweet and affectionate.

They trembled, only slightly aware of the soft, muted sound that passed through gritted teeth. Amethyst asked if they had come, unsure by how quiet they had become. Peridot shyly confirmed it, coming out of the haze and wriggling their boxers back on.

"What about you?" they finally asked, the world back in focus.

Amethyst shrugged. "Maybe later." She went on to say that she was more content to make Peridot come than anything else. Peridot was glad that their camera was off, the heat rising up their neck again, and wondered how they would survive an uninterrupted physical sexual encounter with Amethyst. Maybe they wouldn't survive, but they wouldn't pass on the opportunity.


	18. Chapter 18

When Lapis knocked on the door, shortly after their call with Amethyst, Peridot was self-conscious about how the room smelled.

"Just a minute!" They tripped on the blanket wrapped around their feet, searching for something to spray the room with, before remembering that Lapis was the one who sometimes wore perfume and they didn't have any Febreze in the house. So when Peridot finally opened the door and anxiously let Lapis in, they hoped their roommate didn't smell the musk of their sex.

"What's up, Lazuli?" Peridot leaned against the doorframe, smiling widely in an attempt to play cool.

Lapis looked at them hard for a moment then around the room. She was wearing one of Peridot's shirts with a UFO logo, which fit perfectly on them but on Lapis rode high and offered a glimpse of her belly button. "Do you want to take a nap?"

It was Saturday and Peridot had little else planned except a dissertation about the dog on Li'l Butler. The caffeine from earlier had drained out of their system. The sky was pink, orange, and white outside. A nap sounded nice.

"Right here?" Peridot asked, watching Lapis climb into their bed.

"Yeah. Why not?"

Peridot pushed their glasses up the bridge of their nose before taking them off. They sniffed the air and wondered again if they had left evidence but they were unable to smell it.

"Oh, just. The bed is messy."

"So is mine." Lapis lazily straightened out the covers then lifted one up, inviting Peridot into bed with her. She waited, but when Peridot still stood uncertainly, she dropped the covers and her arm fell at her side. "Would you call this leading you on?"

Peridot shook their head and clambered into bed with her. "No! You're not! I just-"

-'-Probably made the room smell like pussy after having cam sex with Amethyst but you don't need to know that Lazuli,' they finished in their head.

"It's hard to tell," Lapis said.

"Hard to tell what?"

"What is and isn't okay. If friends do this or couples do that... " She trailed off. "You're my only friend."

Peridot found Lapis's hand and squeezed. "It's okay."

"You're just saying that."

"No. Really, it is." It was easier to be close to Lapis again now that they were dating Amethyst, but also because they had admitted to Lapis that the affection had confused Peridot. Her hugs were scarce, though, and there was an awkward distance between them. The distance was only awkward because it had never been there before. Lapis had never stopped holding Peridot's hand or kissing their cheek even after they had broken up. Since their talk, Peridot had the impression that Lapis was constantly censoring herself, but she had been bold enough to suggest taking a nap together. Peridot wondered why she was afraid of everything else but that.

Then, as Peridot was about to fall asleep, the orgasm from earlier making them tired, Lapis said something that pierced the dark, and Peridot knew their roommate hadn't meant to nap at all.

"Do you still want to know why I broke up with you?"

Maybe she hoped Peridot was asleep, the question left to melt in the dark.

Belatedly, Peridot responded. "Why?"

Did it matter at this point? But they were still curious and Lapis's tone suggested she wanted to talk, as if this would finally close the gulf between them. Peridot hoped so. It was uncomfortable sharing a twin bed this far apart.

Silence. Peridot thought Lapis had changed her mind, and then she finally spoke, her voice quavering. "Because..." She hesitated again. Peridot squeezed her hand encouragingly.

"Because I'm not interested in sex."

"You're not?"

Lapis shook her head.

"But you drew porn all the time," Peridot said, referring to the Percy and Pierre fanart Lapis had contributed to the fandom in the past. They still had several favorite pieces saved on their hard drive.

"I know," Lapis said, smiling a little, as if remembering something pleasant, from back then, when they both posted on the Camp Pining Hearts forums. "That's why I didn't understand it either… for awhile. I thought I might be interested if I was drawing that stuff. But I'm not, Peri. I tried."

"When?"

"With you," she said, smile falling flat. Peridot mirrored the expression, the past trickling back again, this time unpleasant memories.

Peridot let go of her hand, head bowed down. "I'm sorry. I was pushy, wasn't I?"

"A little, but I let you. I thought I needed the push. But whenever we would start... I'd get uncomfortable. It didn't feel the same as when you hugged me or when we kissed. It felt..." She stopped, unable to find the words.

"Why did you push yourself so hard?"

"I thought I had to. For our relationship. To be an adult. To understand the things I was drawing."

"Why didn't you just tell me?" they frowned, wondering when they had lost Lapis's trust.

"I was afraid," Lapis replied, and catching Peridot's frown, added, "not about what you would think. It was just, saying it out loud made it more real and I wasn't sure- or I was hoping- I would change my mind. I still liked... I like being close to you."

She took Peridot's hands back. "I like this," she said, closing the distance between them. "I missed you. I miss this."

"We can still be close," Peridot reassured, weaving their fingers together under the covers.

"But what about her?"

Peridot hadn't thought about that. "I'm sure it's okay. But maybe we shouldn't kiss until I ask if it is."

"Probably would be best." At her own mention of Amethyst, Lapis's eyes flickered, unsure. "Can you promise me something?"

Peridot nodded. Their foot found Lapis's and now their legs tangled under the covers. "What is it?"

"Don't leave me behind. Stay with me."

"You're my best friend. I wouldn't, Lazuli."

Lapis could not be convinced. "You might." She rested her chin atop of Peridot's head, blonde hair tickling her nose.

"I won't."

Lapis didn't say anything, adrift in her own thoughts.


	19. Chapter 19

Two weeks after Peridot returned from the trip, after kissing Amethyst, after maturbating together over video chat, Peridot gathered the courage to ask if they were dating. Once the question escaped, they began to instantly regret it until Amethyst answered, "I've been waiting for you to ask that."

That surprised Peridot. Amethyst never waited if she had the choice, meaning she had been just as afraid as Peridot to broach the question.

"Do you want to?"

"Be your girlfriend?"

"Yes." Peridot meant to leave it at that but then they rambled. "I know you're bi-curious and this is just an experiment and we have only been physically intimate for a short while. I understand if you have some qualms-"

"Dude, Peri."

"Yes?"

"I just said I've been waiting for you to ask."

"So… yes?"

"Doy! I mean- fuck yeah."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I've liked you for awhile. Since the first time we video-chatted."

Peridot colored, recalling that awkward mess, the way Amethyst had stopped, the dildo halfway inside of her, staring straight at them.

"Oh, stars. Why? Why that time?"

"I dunno." Amethyst shrugged. "So what do I call you?"

It took a moment for Peridot to figure out what she meant. "Partner should do just fine."

Amethyst tested the term 'partner' in a poorly rendered cowboy voice, to Peridot's chagrin. "That's how I'm going to say it."

"Every time?"

"Every time," she confirmed. Peridot was beginning to see how Amethyst exasperated Pearl.

Idle chatter filled the gaps of silent concentration and rambunctious laughter as they went about their normal routine together. Unless the project Peridot was working on warranted their whole concentration, they left Amethyst on call and in-between work they watched movies or played video games together.

Hours later, after they made their relationship status official, Amethyst brought up visiting. She proposed flying down to see Peridot this time. Spontaneous as they both were, Amethyst bought plane tickets that same night.

Peridot would have liked Amethyst to hop on the first plane available, but their work required a month's notice for vacations. Amethyst texted Peridot nearly every night, groaning about how long it would take for the month would pass. Peridot agreed, mentally ticking off the days every morning as they brewed their coffee.

Before Peridot had invited Amethyst over for sure, they checked with Lapis. They had swallowed a lump in their throat, still adjusting to the term 'girlfriend' not correlating to Lapis. Lapis had assured them she wasn't jealous, but Peridot still had their reservations mentioning Amethyst. They wondered how Lapis and Amethyst would get along. The two women seemed like they would, but Lapis always showed an icy demeanor towards new people, slow to thaw. Amethyst was the opposite, the type of person who liked to break walls instead of easing her way into someone's heart.

"Would it be okay? If my girlfriend, um..." They had been picking the skin around their nails when they had asked, Lapis's gaze dull, unreadable, and chilly.

"Yeah," she replied flatly, eyebrows raised. "Do whatever."

"Are you sure?" The 'whatever' could have been flippant sarcasm or casual ease. Peridot sometimes didn't catch these cues and Lapis was not good at expressing herself except in extreme emotional situations.

"Yes. She can come over. It's your house… you pay most of the rent."

That was true.

"Are you really sure?"

At that, Lapis tousled their hair, making a bigger mess of their mane. "I said it's fine."

X

There was still a lot to prepare for, making Amethyst's visit simultaneously too far and too soon. The house was clean; that was the easy part. And they knew what they would do together when she visited, the places they would go, but after that, alone, in the privacy of Peridot's bedroom...

"Hey, Peridot! You have a bunch of packages in the mail," Lapis called from downstairs one week before Amethyst was to arrive.

Peridot nearly jumped off the ledge overlooking the living room, wanting to forgo the stairs and stand right where Lapis was standing, surrounded by sealed cardboard boxes.

Lapis was examining one of the packages. "'Silicone Sculpture.'" She smirked, handing it off to them.

"Give me that!" they shrieked.

Lapis was already reading from the next package. "Oh! This one is from 'Happy and Healthy Bod.' Wonder what _this_ is."

Peridot snatched that one away too, but Lapis picked up another package, and so on, until Peridot struggled to hold all of the boxes in their arms.

Back in the safe confines of their room, they unboxed all the packages and spread the array of sex toys out on their bed: butt plug, lube, nipple clamps, two ornate glass dildoes, several vibrators, and a complimentary blindfold that had come with the nipple clamps. At the center of the haul was a strap-on dildo and harness.

Peridot kneeled on the floor, at the edge of their bed, staring at the toy they were most eager to try, waiting for Lapis to take her shower. Lapis did not for the most part keep a set schedule but she always showered later in the afternoon. She also owned the only full length mirror in the house.

Peridot cracked the door open and heard the hiss of the showerhead, then quietly closed the door and shucked off their pants. Then, taking a deep, enthused breath, they put on the harness.

After making some adjustments they added the phallus that had come with, average length and aquamarine. The shower was still running, Lapis supposedly inside. Counting on that, Peridot snuck into her room.

Lapis's room was mostly bare and sparsely decorated. A fish tank was the centerpoint of her room, second only to the queen-sized bed. Next to the fishtank was the floor-length mirror. A thin layer of dust covered the glass but Peridot could still see themselves in it. The tension trickled out of their body when they saw how they looked in the harness. They grinned. They made several poses, and at some point the shower stopped running and Lapis was there in the doorway of her own room, staring.

"What are you doing?" She snorted.

Peridot froze. They had been making a strongman pose, one hand on their hip and facing their flexing arm.

This is humiliating, Peridot thought but tried to trudge through the situation, puffing their chest out, hands sagely behind their back and nose in the air. "Trying on my new harness. What does it look like?"

"Like you snuck into my room." Lapis towel-dried her hair. She sat on the edge of the bed, smirking. "Why don't you show me your other toys?"

"I thought you weren't interested in this sort of thing."

She shrugged. "Just curious." And, probably to pull Peridot in the direction she wanted, she tacked on, "It could give me inspiration to draw more fanart."

Peridot took off the harness before returning to their room, Lapis at their heels. She slowly stepped in the room after them, eyes alight on the spread of toys Peridot had left on their bed. Again she laughed, and then sat on her haunches at the foot of the bed next to Peridot.

Lapis picked some of them up and asked questions, and Peridot shyly provided solid answers. More than once, Lapis fiddled with the vibrators and Peridot wasn't surprised when she asked if she could keep one of them.

"You don't need six vibrators," she pointed out.

In the end, Peridot let her have one, because maybe she was right. After Lapis left the room Peridot examined their hoard again. They imagined what Amethyst would think. They bet she would be impressed.


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Chapter contains oral, fingering, and dildos. And. . .sorry I haven't updated. The mirror of this fic has been long completed on a03 but is tedious so I forgot to keep up. If you're interested in my other work please go to my A03 "Tat_Tat"

X

Amethyst's plane arrived at midnight, a little later than intended. The airport was quiet, mostly empty except for those like Amethyst whose plane had just landed.

Peridot was there to pick her up. Amethyst had a large purple duffel bag slung over her shoulder. She was wearing her pajamas and a hoodie, her hair gathered in a thick, loose braid. She greeted Peridot with a kiss. Both put their arms tight around each other.

"I missed you."

"Missed you more."

Peridot pressed their forehead against hers, sharing a chuckle, before they walked back to the car to go home.

During the twenty minute car ride Amethyst found their hand and held it, leaving them to drive one-handed, only occasionally returning both hands on the wheel to merge or fend off an aggressive driver. Amethyst's hand was soft and large, nearly covering the entirety of Peridot's. Her fingers were short, nails fairly long with chipped lavender nail polish. Her presence was warm. Peridot had to turn the cool air on.

When they left the highways and drove deeper into the city, Amethyst took advantage of the stop lights and kissed Peridot. They both fought the urge to pull over and kiss in the backseat, but Peridot drove a little faster than they normally would.

When they parked in front of Peridot's house, they were slow to exit the vehicle, as if dazed, questioning if this was real. Peridot made the first, erratic move, hopping out of the car and racing to open the passenger door.

Amethyst had already opened the door. Peridot took her bag and was surprised by the weight. It felt like their girlfriend had brought a sackful of bricks for the trip.

"What did you pack?!" they asked, setting the bag down as they unlocked the door.

"Clothes, makeup, comics…" Here she paused, granting Peridot a mischievous grin. "…some toys."

Peridot wondered what sex toy would weigh as much as two bowling balls.

"I'll show you when we get to your room," she said as she stepped over the threshold. Her gaze had drifted from Peridot, curiously taking in the living room and the path upstairs, the doors to the bathroom, Lapis's room, and Peridot's room on the second floor.

"Nice place you have here." She really meant it, slowly stepping deeper inside, Peridot following, holding her bag still. "Which one's your room?"

"Last one upstairs, down the hall."

"Race ya."

Amethyst shot them a conspiratorial smile and barreled up the stairs. Peridot struggled to follow, held down by the overloaded duffel bag they were carrying. They could have abandoned it to win the race, but that thought never occurred to them.

Panting toward the bed where Amethyst was waiting for them, Peridot dropped the duffel and fell on the bed next to her. As they caught their breath, hands drifted, their own and Amethyst's. And although Amethyst had promised to unveil the toys in her bag, the contents were forgotten, shoved to the wayside like Amethyst's shirt and bra, her underwear.

The hair framing her sex was neatly trimmed, not the wild tuft that Peridot had seen last month in the hotel room. Already she was wet. Peridot could feel it too, their own dampness cloying, sticking their legs closed already. They had only kissed briefly before Amethyst threw her hoodie off and shimmied out of her pajama pants.

Peridot could feel the heat emanating off their girlfriend's sex as she straddled their face. There was a moment of awe or hesitation, looking from the beautiful lush folds of her labia to her face, flushed with want. Peridot paused, mouth parted, as they inhaled, drinking in her scent, and then Amethyst dragged her hands through Peridot's hair and tugged, impatiently urging them.

"Suck."

Peridot was a good listener. Amethyst told them they were very, very good.

And just like Peridot had said, in the first racy call they had shared, they touched themselves. Their moans vibrated against Amethyst's clit, her sex bearing ruthlessly down against Peridot's face. Amethyst cursed, her legs trembled, and she held onto the bed's headboard for support. She might have been grinding too hard on Peridot, but Peridot didn't care. They loved her hands knotted in their hair, the feel of her coming hard on their face.

"You okay down there?" Amethyst called breathily.

"I'm pretty durable," Peridot promised. Their entire face was slathered in Amethyst's juices and that made her laugh.

"Mmm, messy eater. I like that."

"Was it good?" they asked, hopeful.

"I came."

"Was it your best?" They wiped their mouth with the back of their arm Amethyst mopped the rest off with a stray shirt she grabbed from the floor.

"It was damn good. But I think you can do even better, don't you?"

It wasn't an insult: it was a challenge, confidence in Peridot's capabilities.

"Certainly," Peridot agreed. Amethyst took their hand, the one they had used to masturbate, and licked their fingers.

Peridot entertained the thought of Amethyst returning the favor. She said they tasted good, but they weren't sure if they would be comfortable with that. Amethyst seemed to sense this. She didn't ask, instead saying, "Ready to see what I brought with me?"

She didn't wait for an answer, ducking down to retrieve her bag, ass in the air. Peridot grabbed one ass cheek and Amethyst giggled, pushing into their hands. Momentarily they were distracted as Peridot's fingers had found their way inside of her– imagine that– and Amethyst rolled her hips, panting softly, cursing loudly.

"Fuck, I need something bigger." She looked over her shoulder. "Hold on a sec?"

Peridot drew back their fingers and licked them, greedy for the taste of her. They watched Amethyst retrieve her bag and free the contents one by one, a spread of toys that rivaled Peridot's recent purchases nearly covering the bed.

There was a whip, a ball gag, two hitachi vibrators the size of baseball bats, a pussy pump, and much more. It was overwhelming. They found themselves focusing on the leather strap-on harness and the large purple dildo they were familiar with from her cam shows.

Amethyst picked up the purple dildo. "I call this one the Purple Punisher."

"That sounds like a weapon."

"It could be used as a weapon." Amethyst gently swatted Peridot on the arm with it. "Boop."

Peridot retaliated, rescuing the dildo they had recently purchased from the nightstand drawer.

"En garde!"

"Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die," Amethyst replied, with an accent Peridot didn't recognize.

At their blank expression, Amethyst explained it was a movie reference. Then she thrust the dildo forward. Peridot quickly parried, falling back, but Amethyst was relentless, unleashing blow after blow with her mighty purple dildo. For having such poor reflexes, Peridot was able to fend her off.

The battle moved from the bed to the other end of the room. Amethyst backed Peridot up against the wall and they sorely wished they had chosen the other side of the room for their escape, because then they could have had the bedroom door to their back and gotten free. Amethyst pressed the head of the dildo to Peridot's chest.

"Any last words?"

"What's on your shirt?"

Amethyst's gaze followed Peridot's pointed finger, distracted. "Wait– I'm not wearing a–"

"Yah!" They gave a battle cry, raising their arm to strike. The dildo in their hand wobbled in the air before it met its mark.

It was meant to be a soft, playful blow, and Peridot expected Amethyst to dodge the strike, but Amethyst yelped, clutching her eye. Peridot squeaked, dropping the dildo, their hands over their mouth.

"Amethyst!" Their heart, previously pounding from the light-hearted sparring match, stilled. "I didn't mean to! Amethyst! Amethyst!"

Amethyst slowly drew her hand away from her face, revealing a bright red ring around her eye, a developing bruise. "I'm okay." She waved her hand. "Just– ow! Geez…"

"I'm sorry!" they shouted again.

"It's okay," Amethyst reassured, patting them on the arm. "I wasn't expecting it either." She laughed. "You're stronger than you look."

"You're not mad…?"

"Mad? Pft. Nah. I've had worse. I'm what you would call scrappy." And then, "I was going easy on you anyway."

"Is there anything I can do?!"

"Some ice would be nice."

"I'll be right back!"

As they ran down the stairs Amethyst called from the room, "Can you grab some chips while you're down there? You do have chips, right?"


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: Contains Strap on sex

X

There were no chips in the kitchen. Peridot found the ice pack they used in their lunch box, but they couldn't find any chips. They hoped Amethyst would forgive them for the absent chips and for giving her a black eye.

Just as they had decided that the bag of caramel popcorn would have to do, Lapis popped into the kitchen. She made a beeline for the freezer and took out two fudge popsicles, acknowledging Peridot with a nod.

"Lazuli!"

Peridot hadn't meant to shout. Lapis turned in the middle of unwrapping the first popsicle.

"Yeah?"

"M-my girlfriend is here."

"I know." She bit down on the popsicle with her teeth. Peridot flinched.

"Just thought you'd like to know."

"Okay."

As they headed back upstairs, they noticed Lapis had gathered a bunch of blankets and her clownfish pillow on the couch. She was watching a movie with the sound off, subtitles on, wearing her headphones. Peridot knit their brows, thinking it strange; then Amethyst called for them from their room and it all made sense.

Peridot had always meant to soundproof their walls, long before Amethyst came into their life. Now they realized implementing a sound barrier between their and Lapis's room should have been their first priority- not building up a repertoire of sex toys.

Peridot was naturally quiet, a force of habit from living with their mother; Amethyst was anything but that, loud and brazen. She had shouted, "Fuck!" and "Damn!" and "Peridot!" like a mantra while sitting on Peridot's face.

Lapis had heard everything.

With that in mind, Peridot hurried faster up the stairs. Amethyst mistook the distress for remorse and gently patted them on the arm.  
"Hey, it's okay. I'm not mad," she said, taking the ice pack and bag of popcorn. She dug in without complaint, expertly holding the icepack to her swollen eye using her shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Peridot said again, sitting across from her, hands knotted in their lap. Suddenly they forgot that Lapis had heard everything.

"Psh. I've had worse. Though, you could have aimed for the eye that my hair is always covering up."

"Sorry."

"Stop saying that." She gently prodded at Peridot. "And you don't have to sit so far from me."

"Sorry," Peridot said again without thinking, and sat next to her.

Amethyst leaned against them, the bag of popcorn soon empty and tossed to the floor. They both sat like that in momentary silence as Amethyst pressed the cold compress to her eye and licked her fingers clean.

"Was that your roommate?"

"Who?" Peridot hadn't been paying attention, still feeling sorry for Amethyst's injury.

"The girl you were talking to downstairs."

"Oh." Peridot recollected themselves. "Yes."

"Do you think she heard us?" Amethyst smiled cheekily and began to pull the cold compress away. Her eye was swollen shut, ringed with a deep shade of purple. Amethyst made a joke that it was her favorite color, but Peridot wasn't laughing.

"I killed the mood," they said miserably.

"I'm still down."

"Really?" They wondered if it was insensitive to consider sex again, less than half an hour after clocking their girlfriend in the face with a dildo. But Amethyst sounded ready to move past the incident. She found the blindfold that had arrived with the nipple clamps Peridot had ordered and slipped it sideways over her face to cover her black eye, making a mock eye-patch.

"Yarrr." She took on a gravely voice and pulled Peridot by the front of their shirt. "Ready to plunder me booty, matey?"

This time Peridot couldn't help but laugh.

"I can't hear you."

Peridot kissed her in-between distracted giggles. "Aye, aye, Captain."

Amethyst tugged on the front of their shirt again, leading them on top of her as she lay back, her legs spread.

"You're still wet."

"Yeah, and-? What are you going to do about it?"

Peridot took in a sharp breath. "I'm going to fuck you," they whispered against her ear.

Amethyst wrapped one leg around their waist and grinded her hips against a phantom cock.

It took everything for Peridot to pull away from her. "Hold on. I have something." They reached in the nightstand drawer for the harness and quickly slipped it on. Amethyst's eyes widened, intrigued.

"Can you use this instead?" she asked, holding out the 'Purple Punisher' to Peridot.

"S-sure," they said, amazed by the girth of the toy. They could barely wrap their whole hand around it. Amethyst wasn't kidding when she said she needed something bigger.

The phallus stood pert in the harness. Peridot could feel the weight of it press indirectly against their clit. They could feel the power it held, under Amethyst's hungry gaze. This was yards away from the feeling they had experienced modeling the harness in front of Lapis's mirror. They had felt bold and confident then, but not like this.

Maybe it was the dildo that Amethyst had chosen, thicker than Peridot's fist. Maybe it was because Amethyst was watching them, leading the head of the phallus to her sex, that made them feel giddy and powerful.

"Alright, now move your hips," Amethyst said, her hand still between them, supporting the phallus as Peridot slowly slid inside of her.

"Like this?"

Amethyst shook her head. "You're using your legs too much. The hips." She nodded after a moment. "That's right, you're a fast learner, Peri-dactyl."

"I have an excellent teacher."

Amethyst snorted. "I'm going to tell Pearl that."

Peridot sighed. "Must you mention her?"

"Yeah, you're right. Pearl can be a total mood killer sometimes."

Peridot cupped her cheek and leaned in close, the rhythm of their thrusts growing in confidence, determined to distract her. "Amethyst?"

"Yeah?"

"You feel really good."

"But it's not the real thing."

Peridot rolled their eyes. All technicalities aside, Amethyst did feel nice. "I can feel your body wrapped around me. I can feel myself sinking into you, I can feel your heart pounding against my chest."

"You're sappy," Amethyst teased. "Go on."

Peridot did go on, but not in words. Their hands traced the outline of Amethyst's body, lingering over her breasts and hips, the dimple near her ass. Their fingers caught on the long platinum blonde strands spread out around her face like a halo and they held on as they frantically thrust inside of her.

Whatever idle conversation or retorts Amethyst might have made crumbled, in lieu of a string of curses and various nicknames she had for Peridot.

She did manage a few sentences. "You don't have to go fast, you know."

Peridot stopped, surprised. "I don't?"

"I like it slow and deep. I want to feel you, Peri- ah... yes...! Yes, exactly like that..." She laughed, both legs wrapped tight around Peridot's waist.

Peridot pressed their forehead against hers and they kissed, lips lingering, hands searching. Amethyst raised her hips to follow their slow thrusts. They were both languid, feeling as if they had all of the time in the world.

Amethyst cursed against their mouth, the volume escalating the closer she came to orgasm. She gasped, "You feel so good."

Peridot chuckled, victorious, dragging their nails down her arm, saying, "So you admit it. Even if it's not 'the real thing.'"

"Peri, you are the real deal."

"Who's the sappy one now?" The statement would have sounded like a retort if it weren't for the smile they gave, followed by a kiss. The kiss traveled from her lips down her neck, and lingered at her breasts, tracing the stretch marks.

Amethyst watched them, and Peridot wondered if she was self-conscious, but she didn't look away. Still, Peridot said, because they wanted to, "You're beautiful, Amethyst."

"You're not just saying that?"

"Never."

"Even with this nice shiner you left me?" She lifted up the blindfold that covered her left eye, then frowned, seeing that Peridot wasn't amused.

Peridot cleared their throat. "Yes."

They both decided not to talk after that, mouths preoccupied by deep kisses, hands knotted in bedsheets or each other's hair instead of gesturing. Even when covering her mouth, Amethyst was loud, and she screamed a slurry of expletives when she came. She laughed unapologetically about it afterwards. "You'd think with how loud I was that you were drilling me like a jackhammer or something."

Peridot laid beside her still wearing the harness, the dildo shining with a fresh sheen of their girlfriend's juices. They held hands, Amethyst staring at the ceiling, Peridot at her, an observation escaping their lips.

"That looked fun."

"I had a good time."

"No… I mean... I want to try it."

Amethyst shifted her weight onto her elbows, turning her attention away from the ceiling to Peridot. "Really?"

Seeing that they had piqued Amethyst's curiosity, Peridot nodded, biting their lip, playing with the dead skin around their fingers. "Yes."

Amethyst got up and didn't waste a beat before strapping on her own leather harness. Peridot watched in awe, anticipation thrumming through their body. The idea of putting something inside of themselves was new. They had never even used tampons before. They wondered what it would feel like.

"Does it hurt?" they asked, and Amethyst followed their gaze to the aptly named 'Purple Punisher.'

Amethyst cradled them in her arms, "I won't let it hurt."

"Maybe not that dick," Peridot said.

"Yeah, maybe not."

Peridot offered the dildo that had come with their own harness. Amethyst nodded and pushed it through the hole in the front of her harness.

"How do I look?" She put her hands on her hips, posing.

Peridot might have been drooling, their mouth was hanging open, barely managing to whisper, "You look awesome."

Amethyst chuckled, casually flipping her hair. "I know."

She did not pursue. She sat on the bed, leaning against the headboard, allowing Peridot to initiate at a pace they were comfortable with. Peridot made a slow crawl towards her. Unsure what to do next, they shakily asked.

"Suck," Amethyst replied, and gently led their head down, the silicone phallus bumping against their cheek. Amethyst rolled her hips, continuing to rub it in their face until Peridot caught the phallus in their hand and swallowed it between their ruddy lips.

Amethyst told them they were a natural. She doted on Peridot, hands always on their face, in their hair, moving them how she wanted. She laughed, saying, "You just take it." That was true; Peridot was naturally submissive and eager, so eager to please Amethyst. They wanted to do everything right, and if not correctly, then at least enthusiastically.

"How are we going to do this?" Amethyst asked, staring at the UFO boxers Peridot was wearing. "I guess I could pull them off to the side?" She waited for Peridot's permission, or another suggestion.

Peridot had an idea and drew the covers over them both. "Promise me you won't pull the covers off," they stipulated.

"Promise."

Peridot inhaled, exhaled, then began to wiggle out of their boxers under the privacy of the covers. Amethyst was close and she felt soft curly hair brush against her thigh.

"Shall we begin?"

"Sure- yeah," Amethyst said, and reached under the covers.

Peridot caught her hand. "I'll put it in."

"Sorry."

"It's all right." Peridot's voice was soft. Their gaze was drawn downwards, concentrating. They tugged at the strap on, leading it to their sex.

"Are you wet enough?" Amethyst asked.

"Soaking."

Amethyst kissed their neck as they slid the dildo inside themselves. Peridot made a myriad of noises and shifted restlessly, trying to adjust to the feeling. Amethyst didn't push. She simply encouraged their efforts with kisses, caresses, and the occasional firm grip.

Peridot gasped and said, "It's in."

"How do you feel?"

Peridot shifted restlessly again. "I'm not sure. It feels tight, like... like I don't want to let go?" They shook their head, dissatisfied with that explanation. "It doesn't feel unpleasant. Just strange. Different."

"Do you want to-"

"Of course I want to keep going." They had only scratched the surface.

"I'm going to move," Amethyst warned.

"I'm ready."

Amethyst was slow, her thrusts shallow. Peridot gripped her tightly, panting, acclimating to the sensation. They said it burned slightly, not unpleasantly. "It's not pain."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. It's different, isn't it?"

Peridot nodded. "It feels like a rubber band being stretched out. Only inside of me."

"But you're all right? You want to keep going?"

At Peridot's nod, Amethyst fucked them slowly. Her pace slowly built up, following their vocal cues.

"Faster!" they gasped, raising their hips. "Harder." They strained to supercede Amethyst's movements, to get what they wanted. Peridot was surprisingly voracious in this department.

"Faster! Harder!" Peridot demanded again, short clipped nails digging into Amethyst's backside.

Amethyst stopped. She was tiring but hadn't reached the point where she had to catch her breath.

"Peri, I don't have that kind of stamina..."

"What do you suggest?"

"I don't know. You could get on top?"

"Excellent idea, Amethyst!" They would have sprung up if Amethyst hadn't been pinning them to the mattress. That was a good thing, since they had nearly forgotten they were naked below the waist.

This made them realize that it would be hard to be on top and to keep the covers on them. Peridot looked around the room, searching for an idea, biting a hangnail.

Their eyes locked onto their cracked open dresser drawer. "Hold on, Amethyst. I have an idea." They wiggled impatiently under her, searching for their boxers that had drifted somewhere underneath the covers. Finding their clothes, they swiftly redressed and went to the dresser, searching through its contents. They pulled out a yellow sundress that was clearly too long for them to walk around in.

"My mom got it for me," Peridot explained, catching the surprise on Amethyst's face.

Clothes like this were not usually Peridot's first choice, but they reasoned it would be efficient and far more comfortable than being naked from the waist down. It was like a poncho or blanket, they said to themselves as they put it on. They looked good in yellow, but the rest of the dress was a mismatch to their presentation. Even Amethyst blinked, finding it strange.

It only felt awkward for a moment when Peridot crossed the room back to the bed. They reached under the dress to shed their boxers again and straddled Amethyst. Leading the silicone phallus back inside of them again, they soon forgot they were wearing a dress.

Holding onto her shoulders for support, Peridot moved, first slow and experimental and then erratic and violent. Amethyst had tried to keep up, meeting their movements, but soon gave up, laying back and watching them with a pleased grin on her face.

"You like that?"

"Y-yes!" Peridot croaked out, staggering. In spite of their legs cramping and the overwhelming pleasure they continued relentlessly.

Amethyst frowned slightly, feeling the tension in Peridot's legs. "Do you want to take a break?"

"No." There was fire in Peridot's eyes. "I want to come."

Amethyst let it go. She held Peridot by the hips. After a few more minutes of Peridot riding her hard, they finally heaved a frustrated sigh and laid flat on top of her, the dildo still inside, without the energy to move.

"I had fun." Amethyst kissed their cheek.

Peridot was quiet, catching their breath. Amethyst stroked their back, their heart pounding against her palm. Their legs were entangled and stuck together, slick with sweat. The smell of sex was pungent in the air, the room humid.

Amethyst said, "I liked how you looked on top of me, Peri."

But Peridot could only focus on one thing. "But I didn't come!" they shouted. "Why?! I was so close and more turned on than I've ever been! I should have! I should have come!" They bristled in Amethyst's arms and she held them close and tight. It was like wrestling a cat about to be dipped in a bath.

"Release me, Amethyst! Let's try again!"

"Dude, no. I'm tired."

"Just let me do all the work again. I know I'll be able to climax this time." One eye was on one of the vibrators sprawled just out of reach.

"Peri. Chill."

"I will not 'chill!'"

From below came a sharp thumping noise: Lapis banging at the ceiling with a broom from downstairs, telling them they were both too loud.

Distracted, Amethyst loosed her grip, looking in the direction of the noise. Peridot leapt out of her arms, taking advantage of this, quickly snatching two vibrators before Amethyst pinned them down again.

"You don't need to come."

"Yes. I. Do!"

Again, Lapis impatiently rapped at the space between them. This time neither heard her, playing a tug of war with the hitachi wand.

"You'll hurt yourself!"

"I won't!"

"Uh. Yeah, you will. Gimme that."

"Fine!" Peridot let go and Amethyst fell back against the bed. Peridot ran on all fours, gathering the sex toys.

Amethyst bounded back on her feet and chased after them while Lapis continued to beat at the ceiling.

"Why won't you let me come?!" Peridot cried out petulantly as Amethyst grappled them to the floor again. One by one she confiscated all the sex toys and threw them in the closet.

"It's not that I won't let you come," Amethyst said, demeanor softening. "It's that I don't want you to feel obligated to." Amethyst sighed and wrapped an arm around Peridot, pulling them in close. "I know you want to impress me."

Peridot nodded.

"But you don't have to try so hard."

"But if I don't try, won't that mean I don't care?"

Amethyst shook her head and poked their nose, "no, silly. You can still try, just within your own comfort zone. Like when you told me you like to keep your clothes on during? Stuff like that."

"So you're not… I don't know. I wanted you to feel successful. Like you were doing a good job."

"And? Did I?"

Peridot met her gaze, unsure if they should answer that, if what they said would be the correct response. "Yes! Even though I didn't reach climax- I had fun."

"Good. Me too."

Peridot could feel in Amethyst's gaze and her fingers interlocking with theirs that she meant it. They relaxed and slowly lay their head down in her lap. They were still wearing the yellow dress and they hadn't climaxed, but they were comfortable and Amethyst was here. They didn't mind the minor incongruities.

They might have fallen asleep in her lap like that, bathing in the afterglow like a cat under a sunbeam, but a clipped knock came to the door, and on impulse alone, Peridot sprang from Amethyst's lap and answered it.

It was Lapis. She was holding a broom in one hand and looking past Peridot, over their shoulder, to Amethyst, who was still naked except for the leather harness.

"Hey. It's Lapis, nice to meet you. Are you two going to be this loud the whole time?"


	22. Chapter 22

Lapis didn't bat an eye or make a comment about Amethyst sitting naked on Peridot's floor, wearing the evidence of the sexual activities they had been up to.

Amethyst took the confrontation in the same stride, waving. However, her voice had flattened, displeased. "Name's Ame."

"I've been wearing headphones and I can still hear you two." Lapis crossed her arms. She was still holding the broom which she had used to rap at the ceiling.

"Well, we just finished. So you can go back to your beauty sleep, princess." Amethyst rolled her eyes.

"I wasn't sleeping," Lapis shot back. Then she regarded Peridot and this time she did react, her eyes widening over the yellow dress they were wearing.

"You said you hated that dress."

"It's my fucking dress."

"For fucking," Amethyst added.

Lapis almost cracked an amused smile at that. "Just be quiet." And she closed the door, her soft footfalls going down the stairs. Peridot had a feeling Lapis wouldn't be sleeping in her own bed tonight.

X

Eventually over the course of the week, Lapis moved back into her room, although Peridot noticed a box of earplugs left on the kitchen counter.

As for Amethyst and Peridot, their visits downstairs were few and far between, reserved only to use the bathroom or to shower, or most importantly: to eat or grab snacks from the kitchen.

And in a matter of a few hours since she arrived, Amethyst had redecorated Peridot's room with her own personal charm, leaving all manner of things on the floor, the bed, and a pair of panties on the ceiling fan (when that had happened, neither could guess). One afternoon Peridot rolled over and woke up with something poking their side. It was a fork.

Amethyst was still asleep as they cleaned the room, inspired by finding a whole silverware set between the sheets. Peridot wondered how neither of them had noticed that last night when they were fucking.

Amethyst slowly woke to the chime of spoons and forks in a plastic bag (collected to be carried to the kitchen sink). She rolled onto her belly and stretched out all four limbs. With her wild bed head, she looked like a lion, luxuriantly rising out of bed.

"What ya up to, Petri-dish?"

"Cleaning."

Amethyst scrunched her face. "Lame."

"What's 'lame' is getting stabbed in the back with a fork."

"Geez. Sorry." Amethyst huffed. "Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed."

"I literally did."

Amethyst got out of bed and slipped on an oversized, faded, black T-shirt. "Anything I can do?"

Peridot looked over their shoulder, skeptical. "You're joking, right?"

Judging by Amethyst's room during her cam shows, Peridot saw Amethyst as a mess-maker, a hoarder. Pearl's comments and now Peridot's firsthand experiences cemented this. Peridot could be messy too when they were working on an intense project, but for the most part the house was usually clean.

"I'm your guest," Amethyst said. Given no order, she started to pick her clothes off the floor.

"Doesn't the guest usually let the host clean?"

Amethyst shrugged. "I don't know, but I don't want to overstay my welcome." She took the broom Lapis had left at the door days ago and used it to get the panties that were hanging off the ceiling fan.

"Washing machine?"

"Downstairs," Peridot said, hoisting the plastic bag of silverware over their shoulder. "I'll show you."

"Don't tell Pearl about this, okay?"

Peridot offered the smarmiest of grins. "Hmm. I don't know. What's in it for me?"

Their free hand slipped between Amethyst's legs. Her sex was warm and Peridot wondered what their girlfriend had been dreaming about to be wet right after waking.

"Oh I dunno…" Amethyst said, winking. "A lot." The black eye that Peridot had accidentally given her was starting to fade from deep purple to a sickly yellow. Amethyst had covered it up for the most part, either with the blindfold or with make-up. When she used the latter method Peridot could hardly believe it was still there underneath all the foundation and Amethyst's expert skill.

"What's a lot?"

"I'll show you– right after you show me where the washer is."

Peridot led her to the 'laundry room' in the basement, and after loading all her clothes, Amethyst leapt onto the washer and spread her legs. Her body, her voice was distorted by the vibrations of the washing machine. When Peridot had finished licking their fingers and Amethyst's sex clean, the load was done.

While Amethyst loaded the clothes in the dryer, Peridot traveled upstairs, promising to fix something to eat, but as they came up the stairs, the smell of pan-fried noodles, steamed rice, and shrimp wafted towards them.

"You ordered take-out?"

The evidence was there on the kitchen table: three white containers of Chinese food and Lapis splitting the wooden chopsticks.

Lapis saw Peridot but didn't reply. Peridot spoke again. "If I knew you were going to order take-out, we could have ordered something." Were they talking to Lapis or just speaking out loud? They weren't sure.

"How could you know?" Lapis clenched her chopsticks and grabbed a white container. "You haven't spoken to me for most of the week. Not since she's been here."

Peridot flinched, taken aback by Lapis's tone. Her demeanor, her eyes were chillier than Peridot had ever seen her. She looked absolutely terrifying. Although she and Peridot had argued in the past, and had a brief period of animosity after the breakup, they couldn't remember the last time Lapis had frightened them. Not since the first day at college, years ago, before the house, when they lived in the dorms and Lapis had stalked into the room, ignoring their introduction.

The walls around Lapis that Peridot had melted away had been rebuilt in less than a week.

"I've been busy?" Peridot tried lamely.

"Busy fucking," Lapis muttered.

Peridot opened their mouth but couldn't find an excuse or a reason. They nearly said that they hadn't seen Amethyst in a while and that they were just excited to see her. They almost quipped that they had been doing more than just fucking, but that would only dig another barb in Lapis's side. They could have easily included Lapis in a movie, a game, or just lazing. But they hadn't, and Peridot squirmed, feeling sorry but also knowing Lapis wouldn't accept an apology so easily.

Lapis held onto grudges like a double-edged sword, no matter how much it hurt her. And that barb in her side? She was content to leave it there to fester. When they first met her, Peridot thought that Lapis liked to suffer like a martyr, but as they came to know her, they learned that Lapis was so used to turmoil that she accepted any terrible thing, and rather than appear submissive and succumb to it, she stood tall and acted as if she chose it for herself.

"Am I wrong?" Lapis challenged.

Peridot swallowed. Lapis arched a brow. Her food was getting cold.

"Maybe," Peridot admitted, eyes misty, mind scrambling to find the right words to rescue their friendship. They could feel the string between them taut and fraying.

Lapis turned her head away, not so she could eat or ignore Peridot. Her thin frame was shaking and she was trying to keep herself steady, both hands firm on the table. But then she sniffled sharply and exhaled deeply like it was difficult to breathe.

"Lapis, are you crying?" Peridot stepped closer.

Lapis shook her head and she made a warbling noise that confirmed it. Yes, she was crying.

"Don't look." Her voice was watery.

From the corner of their eye, Peridot saw Amethyst streak past. Peridot fought the urge to chase after her and refocused their attention on Lapis.

"I won't look," they assured her.

Lapis held back more tears, trembling. She managed to hold back until Peridot held her hand. Something in her snapped then and she lost control, shuddering and gasping and finally openly crying in Peridot's arms.

When Lapis's tears ebbed she said, "You're going to fall in love and leave me behind."

"What are you talking about?"

"Even if it's not her, it will be someone else. Because you and me: we're just friends. And friends are always second after a romantic interest."

Peridot knit their brows. "It's not like that."

"It is like that. You just said so."

"I said 'maybe.'"

Lapis was silent.

The skin around Peridot's nails was shredded and pink. It hurt but still they picked at their skin, almost unaware of what they were doing to themselves. They looked to Lapis desperately and wished they had the right words at the tip of their tongue, the right action to make it better. But they didn't know what to do or say, so instead they did the next best thing and asked.

"Just tell me what to do. And I'll do it." They said, immediately regretting the statement, thinking: what if Lapis asked them to break up with Amethyst?

They weren't sure they could do that.

Lapis looked at them from the corner of her eyes. Her silence was impenetrable and made Peridot think of the worst. They thought maybe there wasn't a way to make this right without hurting either woman. Whatever the outcome, Peridot knew their heart would be sore.

Finally, Lapis said, "I wish I was like her." She looked surprised, like she hadn't meant to say it out loud.

"What are you talking about?"

"Because then our relationship would have worked," she said. "And then I wouldn't have broken up with you." She didn't wait for Peridot to speak. "Is sex that important to you?"

Peridot dreaded that question. Again they didn't know what they could say to dissolve the situation and placate Lapis. They only knew the truth, the answer they had at the front of their thoughts that they had held back for a better option.

"I like the closeness that I get from sex. I… I can't describe it, Lazuli."

Lapis huffed, rolling her eyes and quickly turned away, muttering, "I knew it."

"But you're more important to me than that. And Amethyst is too. I'm not just with her because we have a sexual relationship– I love her."

Peridot quickly covered their mouth. They wondered if Amethyst was still listening. They hadn't meant to tell Lapis– they hadn't told Amethyst yet either.

Clearing their throat, moving on, nerves high, theys aid, "If you had told me what was going on, I would have tried. I loved you, Lapis. I still would do about anything for you. Even now, I still…" They stopped, sniffling. "My friends. They told me I was nuts for still letting you live with me after we broke up. But I couldn't imagine a day where I woke up and you weren't there. Even now, I still can't, even with Amethyst I wouldn't take back what we have here. You're a crappy roommate, you don't pay rent, but you're my best friend. I love you, Lapis."

"As a friend?"

"As a friend."

Lapis paused. Her hands found theirs. "I love you too."

How long ago had they said this before? It felt different from the previous time. It was a relief to finally be able to say it again on different terms.

After waiting for tears to dry and sinuses to clear, Peridot patted her hand. "Your food is getting cold, Lazuli."

"It's been cold."

Peridot offered to microwave it for her. Lapis watched them, silent again but not despondent. Her manner was as gentle and revitalizing as a halcyon spring, full of beginnings.

She got up and placed her hand on Peridot's shoulder, pulling their gaze from the microwave counting down the minutes.

"I've kept you from her long enough."

She gently shoved Peridot out of the way, taking their spot in front of the microwave. Peridot looked upstairs, to their door, which was closed, then to Lapis, whose arms were folded, staring in the direction of the microwave, waiting for them to leave.

"Lapis?" Their hand drifted across the wall as they peered back into the kitchen. "I love you."

Lapis said nothing. Her smile widened.

Peridot climbed the staircase.


	23. Chapter 23

Amethyst was waiting for them, holding a hand mirror and just adding the finishing touches to her make-up. She was dressed as if they had planned to go out today.

Maybe that was a good idea. Ever since she arrived, they had stayed cooped up in the house, bathing in each other's company.

Distantly, Peridot wondered how much Amethyst had heard. Did she resent Lapis? Had she overheard when Peridot had blurted out that they were in love with her? What did she think of them now?

If she thought anything, she hid it well, shrugging her shoulders to pop a crick in her neck before saying, "Hey, what kept you?"

"Roommate stuff." Peridot closed the distance between them. With her makeup on, Amethyst had erased any sign of the black eye. Without their asking, Amethyst started to apply makeup to Peridot's face.

"Oh yeah?"

"She's late on rent." That part was true.

Amethyst nodded, dabbing liquid foundation under Peridot's eyes and on their chin, cheeks, and forehead. She spread it all out with a thick brush.

"So, you wanna eat out?"

"I want to eat you out." Peridot winked. Amethyst almost frowned, annoyed that they had moved while she was filling in their brows, but the joke registered before that happened. She laughed and gave a gentle push on the shoulder.

"As much as I'd like that, you and I both know you can't sustain yourself on pussy alone."

As if overhearing the conversation, Peridot's stomach growled. The room filled with laughter and Amethyst hurriedly finished their eyebrows.

"What do you want to eat?" they asked a few minutes later after putting on a fresh change of clothes.

"Chinese. What do you think?"

Peridot thought that Amethyst's decision was influenced by smelling Lapis's Chinese takeout during the conversation she may or may not have heard in its entirety.

"Sure. Chinese."

"You sound thrilled," Amethyst sarcastically remarked.

"Sorry. I was thinking..."

Amethyst did not ask what they were thinking about.

X

Lapis was still downstairs in the kitchen, rinsing her plate and fork, empty Chinese take out containers poking out of the trash.

She waved. Amethyst raised her hand up a fraction in greeting. It fell back to her side soon after. Peridot stiffened. This was the second time the two had had direct contact with each other. Things hadn't escalated, but with the talk they had with Lapis less than an hour ago and the things they had said that Amethyst may have heard, they were eager to exit out the back door.

As Peridot walked past, Lapis stopped them, saying, "Are you wearing makeup?"

There was a note of surprise in her voice, the same as a few nights ago when Peridot had answered their bedroom door wearing the yellow sundress.

Peridot didn't know what to say, they wondered what this looked like to Lapis.

"You look nice, Peri," she said, actually smiling.

"Thanks. Amethyst did it for me."

"I'm not surprised." Lapis had turned her attention to Amethyst, clearly admiring the winged eyeliner and dark eyeshadow. "I'm not very good with makeup either. I just wear chapstick."

Peridot smiled a little, previous anxiety dissipating. Lapis had let down her walls, finding something to talk about with Amethyst. She was trying for Peridot's sake.

Amethyst shrugged her shoulders. She took Peridot by the arm and ushered them closer to the door. "Come on. I thought you said you were hungry."

Again, Peridot's stomach answered for them.

X

The Chinese restaurant was only four minutes away from where they lived. Peridot couldn't remember the last time they had eaten in as they both entered the restaurant. There was plenty of room to sit even though the restaurant was bustling with life as servers and delivery workers rushed to put together orders. The dine-in area smelled faintly of soy sauce and the carpet store next door.

Amethyst and Peridot seated themselves, picking up paper menus on the way. In under a minute, a server took both their drink orders.

Amethyst was still looking at the menu when he left. "What's the deal with your roommate?"

Peridot almost spat into their drink.

"Who? Lazuli?"

"Unless you got another roommate I don't know about."

Peridot set their glass down, smiling nervously.

"She's pretty." Amethyst bitterly commented. "It sounds like she still likes you."

"Just as a friend."

It was now obvious that Amethyst was only pretending to read the menu, her mind set long before she had started this conversation. "I've heard that one before."

Before Peridot could reply, Amethyst looked up, her eyes beady, lower lip trembling. "You know, I thought if I dated someone who wasn't a guy, it would be different."

There was a brief pause in the conversation as the server returned to take their orders. As soon as he left Peridot sat up slightly out of their seat, both hands on the table. "It's not like that, Amethyst."

"Gee, but you sure are sounding like the rest of 'em."

"Then what do you want me to say?"

Amethyst shrugged. "I don't know? Lie to me? Shit. Fuck that. Just... fuck." She wiped the corner of her eye.

Peridot wondered why Amethyst would choose a public setting of all places to talk about this. As they paused, unsure what to say, they realized that maybe she didn't want to risk Lapis listening in as Amethyst had earlier this afternoon.

And maybe also- recalling the conversation with Pearl, when Amethyst's ex had been briefly mentioned- Amethyst had set it up so Peridot wouldn't do anything hasty since they were in a public space. Peridot frowned, hurt that Amethyst would think they might do that, sad that Amethyst had had to learn to take these measures.

"Amethyst, please trust me when I say there's nothing going on between me and Lazuli. I'm with you now."

"I want to trust you," she admitted. "But it's hard."

"How much did you hear?"

"Up until I ran off. Shit was getting awkward."

"It was awkward for me too," Peridot said. They chanced taking Amethyst's hand. She did not pull back.

"I'll tell you what happened. And if you still don't trust me, then..." They trailed off. "Then there's nothing else I can do." They squeezed her hand as if it would be the last time and shared what they had talked about with Lapis, excluding the bit where they had accidentally proclaimed their love for Amethyst.

When Peridot finished, all Amethyst asked was, "What's an ace?" As part of the background to the conversation, Peridot had mentioned that Lapis had come out to them as asexual.

"It means she's not interested in sex."

Amethyst made a face. "Why not?"

"I don't know. It's how she feels."

"Weird."

"I know it must be hard for you to imagine."

"Well, yeah. I mean... I'm just. How?" Amethyst paused to suck her soda through a straw, taking in this new information. "I guess that's good for me though. Is that why she broke up with you?"

Peridot nodded. "She never told me until a few weeks ago."

"Do you still like her?"

"Since you? No. After we met, I was able to let go of the baggage I had for Lazuli. I still love her, but it's a different type of love."

"Like me and Pearl?"

Peridot was surprised, given how much Amethyst ragged on Pearl, but it made sense somehow. "Yes, like that."

"Me and Pearl never dated," Amethyst rushed to say, and after a pause, stirring her straw, she admitted, "Well, all right. I had a tiny crush on her when I was younger."

Peridot snorted. "Pearl?"

Amethyst turned red. "Hey, it's like my big sis always said: you gotta start with a nerd."

"I'm a nerd. Are you still starting out, Amethyst?"

"Bite me."

"And I will- with relish." At that Amethyst tightened her hold on Peridot, grinning widely.

The timing was perfect. Soon after emotional ties were tightened and they were both again thrumming with salacious energy, plates of food were set in front of them. They scarfed it down, hungry for food and for each other.

They didn't even wait for the bill. Peridot knew the prices like the back of their hand and left thirty dollars, more than enough to pay for the meal and leave a tip.

They might have driven a bit erratically but no one else was on the road. That was just as well since Amethyst had taken the hand closest to her and placed it between her legs, showing off how wet she already was.

When she leaned forward to kiss their neck, Peridot floored it.


	24. Chapter 24

"It's not a very intimate position, is it?" Peridot observed. Amethyst was on all fours, presenting her ass, with a dildo half the size of the "Purple Punisher" wedged inside of her pussy. Peridot's hands hovered over her love handles. They were wearing the strap-on harness again, and unlike the other dildos they had used before, this one was slim, uncharacteristic of Amethyst's tastes, they thought.

But this was Amethyst's idea. She looked over her shoulder and pulled them into a long, sloppy kiss. "Depends how you look at it."

"How should I look at it?"

"Get inside me and keep kissing me," she breathed.

Peridot took her direction, hands gripping her sides as they thrust into her ass.

"Oh fuck!"

Peridot covered her mouth, muffling the expletives that followed. "I think we should be courteous to our neighbor, don't you, Amethyst? Think you can keep quiet?"

Amethyst shook her head, brutally honest.

"That's what I thought." They reached behind them for one of the toys Amethyst had brought with her: a ball gag. Soft, pliable, made of silicone and hollowed out with holes for breathing room. Amethyst opened her mouth without question and accepted the gag in her mouth. Peridot kissed her collarbone and then they resumed, moving with the achingly slow pace that Amethyst preferred.

They missed the sounds their girlfriend usually made with loud abandon, which were muted and muffled by the gag, but they also liked to watch her struggle as she contained herself and fought against the obstruction in her mouth.

As they moved, Amethyst did too, not exactly in rhythm to their thrusts. She was moving to her own tempo, riding the cock filling her cunt. The sensation she had explained was overwhelming and Peridot could see that she could barely keep hold of the headboard she was using as support. She shivered, hot and sweating. Her messy, untrimmed bangs stuck to her forehead and long tendrils of hair clung to her back and sides.

Peridot held her steady as she struggled to hold herself up. When Peridot almost faltered, thinking they had gone too far, Amethyst took their hand and gripped it tight. She only let go when Peridot promised they would continue. Her hands knotted in bedsheets and around the headboard. She could not keep a continuous grip on anything. Her hands were always moving.

Amethyst moaned, bucking her hips wildly, undeterred by the sharp shivers racing up and down her body. Peridot held her, coaxed her, soothed her. They knew her well enough to know that she was close to orgasm. They could feel it too. It was a transference of energy, or they were that into it, or they had that good of an imagination to feel like the phallus they were fucking her with was real, and at that the same time, they could feel the other cock, the one inside of Amethyst's pussy, brushing against their own cock.

They could smell the heat of her sex and they could feel her clench around their penis. They heard a muffled cry and they both fell forward as she came underneath them. The reverberations of her orgasm provoked their own and they trembled together in bed, Amethyst clutching the bedsheets, Peridot clinging to her.

And the words escaped them again, so easily like when they had talked to Lapis: "I love you."

Amethyst turned her head to look at them. Peridot froze, burning up.

"NOTHING!" They pulled away and out of Amethyst, gesturing wildly. "I did not just tell you, 'I love you' or anything stupid just now! Yep! Just ignore that and me failing at internal monologuing!"

Amethyst reached behind her head to undo the ball gag. She wiped the drool off her chin with the back of her hand. "You love me?"

"I would never- wait. I mean-" They shouted unintelligibly, frantic, unable to cover their tracks.

Amethyst rested a hand on their shoulder and they calmed down a little to quiet muttering.

"It's cool, relax."

"I cannot relax!" Peridot straightened, biting their nails. "I said something careless! And we've only been dating for a few months!"

Amethyst shrugged. "So?"

"So! That's moving too fast! What's next? Are we going to get married-" Peridot gasped. "I am not wearing a dress! And I'm allergic to almost all flowers so we'll have to..." They stopped, realizing their rambling had escalated the love confession to wedding plans, neither of which Amethyst had reciprocated. They assumed the fetal position and fell on their side, mortified and deciding on the spot that they would never talk ever again.

That vow would be broken in a few seconds, as most of their vows of silence were.

"Why's it too fast? Because people say so? Who cares! You can't help how you feel, Peri."

"I should," they said petulantly.

"Come here, you." She captured them in her arms and planted a kiss at the base of their neck. "So hey, guess what."

"What?"

"I love you too."

After a moment of laying sprawled in each other's arms, after a moment of taking in the acceptance and reciprocation of their feelings, Peridot said, "Well of course you do. I'm adorable."

"Adorkable," Amethyst corrected. She ran her fingers across their knuckles, humming and grinning ear to ear. Her eyes were locked on Peridot's, not searching but finding something. "You know, I sorta gave up on dating before I met you."

Peridot distantly recalled the outdated Stupid Cupid dating profile. They wondered when Amethyst had made it, when she gave up on it. "But you're beautiful."

"Yeah, well I'm also fat. And loud. And there's a lot of jerks out there."

Peridot felt fortunate that none of their dates with other people had been a disaster. Lapis might have counted as disastrous a long time ago, but things were different now.

"What would you have done? If we hadn't met," Peridot asked.

"Same as I was doing." Amethyst shrugged, her hair moving like water over her shoulders. "Sleeping around, trying not to get too attached. What would you have done?"

"I don't know." Before Amethyst, they had no one to explore their sexuality with. They couldn't fathom being comfortable enough to do this with anyone else, although they had tried. "Be alone, I guess."

The conversation had somehow taken a sad turn. Amethyst veered it off course, saying, "I'm glad I met you, Peri."

"Me too."

X

Together, they spent the rest of the late evening under the covers, kissing languidly, stray touches culminating into sexual release and then ebbing again into the afterglow of affection, then rising again. This went on until Peridot's sex was sore and Amethyst got a crick in her neck and they were both completely exhausted.

They were not tired enough to go to sleep, however, and Peridot proposed a movie. Amethyst surprised them and suggested that Lapis join in- if she wanted to.

Although Lapis's blanket and clownfish pillow were still downstairs on the couch facing the TV., she had resumed sleeping in her own room. She was not asleep when Peridot knocked, Amethyst behind them.

Lapis chose the movie. It was her and Peridot's favorite, the one they had watched together months ago while Peridot worked from home. Together they knew every line and Amethyst was simultaneously impressed and annoyed. When she voiced this, Peridot pointed out that she did the same thing during their Li'l Butler marathons together. Amethyst just rolled her eyes and shrugged noncommittally.

After that Amethyst chose the movie, and after that, Peridot chose the Camp Pining Hearts movie. At Amethyst's request they watched the Spanish dub with English subtitles. Halfway through the movie, Peridot fell asleep and dreamed that Percy swept them off their feet, speaking frantically in Spanish.

"I have no idea what you're saying," Peridot said in the dream. "But go on."

Then Pierre stepped into the dream sequence, shirtless and holding two heavy barrels under his strong arms because he could.

The dream was about to get interesting, the language barrier dissolving in favor of something physical, when Peridot heard distant girlish laughter and they woke with a start, the image of Percy and Pierre fighting for dominance with their tongues quickly receding.

The TV was off and daylight had crept into the room. Peridot found themselves spread out on the couch, the cover and pillows on the floor.

Lapis and Amethyst were not here.

They heard giggling from the kitchen and got up. As they walked, bare feet slapping against the kitchen tiles, they wiped the grime from the corners of their eyes and smacked their lips, craving a drink of water.

"Amethyst?" they called into the kitchen, voice hoarse. "Lazuli?"

"Yo! In here!" They saw Amethyst's hand peek out from the corner of the room as she waved. Peridot walked a little faster, then stopped, surprised to see the two women together.

Lapis was sitting in a chair, facing upwards as Amethyst stood over her, across from her, applying makeup.

"Lazuli- your hair-!"

Her hair was cut short and dyed a bright blue, the swept up remains in the dustbin with some strays around her seat.

"Do you like it?" she asked, primping at her hair.

"You look great."

She smirked like she knew it. Amethyst shared a more genuine smile, proud but not full of herself.

"Laz wanted a new 'do."

"Where did you get the hair dye from?" Peridot wouldn't have asked if they hadn't just woken up.

"I borrowed your car," Lapis said easily.

Peridot soured, thinking that later they'd have to adjust the seat again. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"We wanted to surprise you."

Peridot swept up the rest of Lapis's hair from the floor while Amethyst finished her makeup.

"So how did you two get close?" It wasn't like Lapis to bond with someone overnight.

Amethyst snickered before answering. She and Lapis looked near hysterical, like they couldn't contain themselves. "I farted. She laughed."

Peridot snorted and shot a look like they were unimpressed. Still they smiled, pleased that the two were more than getting along- they were becoming friends.

After they swept the floor, they made a pot of coffee and listened to Lapis and Amethyst idly chattering about makeup and clothes. Lapis commented that it had been awhile since she bought anything new and nice for herself, and Amethyst was delighted to offer to help her shop at the mall later. Peridot considered the fact that they needed a new pair of shoes and chimed in, agreeing that after breakfast they would all go out shopping.

Peridot filled three mugs with piping hot coffee and Amethyst made breakfast burritos, explaining that while she and Lapis went out shopping for hair dye, they had gotten groceries as well.

A warm meal. A hot cup of coffee cradled in their hands. Peridot and the two women ate and talked and laughter bounced off the walls of the kitchen. The house had never felt warmer and Peridot thought that so much had changed in just a few months. As Amethyst took their hand and they followed Lapis out the door, they looked forward to what would happen next.

-The End.


End file.
